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    Posted on Jan 18, 2013

    A Dude's Guide To Making Out With A Beer Bottle

    You'll never have a dull drinking experience again!

    If you can, start practicing at an offensively young age.

    But if you're starting later in life, fill a baby bottle with beer to help you catch up with the toddler group.

    Practice licking often, and not just with beer bottles!

    Try lapping at a comically large bottle of wine.

    Or practice on your hot pink bowling ball, for example.

    When you're ready for the real beer bottle deal, bring a friend for moral support.

    Have him hold the bottle while you lick.

    Or feed it to you, like a momma beer bear.

    Eventually, solo beer licking glory will be yours for the taking!

    And it will be stupendous.

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    Happy licking, everyone!

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