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14 Composers Who Are Actually Trying To Kill You

How else can these traumatic choices be explained? Goodbye, dignity.

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1. Jeanine Tesori, who didn't wait past the overture of Thoroughly Modern Millie to humiliate you in front of your entire high school.

Music Theatre International / Via mike2.com

2. John Williams, who mistakenly didn't leave rests for you to facepalm after these annotations in the Star Wars suite.

Hal Leonard Corporation / Via imgur.com

3. Laurence O'Keefe, who made you insanely uncomfortable in the pit orchestra of Bat Boy: The Musical.

Weekly World News and Dramatists Play Service / Via mike2.com

4. Ron Nelson, who may as well have instructed you to mime the third movement of "Courtly Airs and Dances."

G. Schirmer / Via imgur.com

5. Julius Fucik, who seemed to think fortissimo was 12 times too quiet for his needs in "Florentiner Marsch, Op. 214."

Public Domain / Via officialdeadparrot.tumblr.com

6. Carlos Gonzalo Guzmán Muñoz, who apparently thought this impossible request in "Pajarillo...Cuñao!" was reasonable.

Carlos Gonzalo Guzmán Muñoz / Via reddit.com

7. Jon Schmidt of The Piano Guys, who is still laughing as you try to figure out his meaningless annotations.

JS Productions / Via onlinesheetmusic.com
JS Productions / Via onlinesheetmusic.com
JS Productions / Via onlinesheetmusic.com

8. Peter Schickele (a.k.a. "P. D. Q. Bach"), who destroyed every last shred of your dignity in "The Musical Sacrifice."

Theodore Presser Company / Via knowyourmeme.com

9. The clueless buffoons at First Division Publishing, who subjected you to the pain of hearing your alto sax teacher utter these words.

First Division Publishing Corporation / Via collegehumor.com

10. This anonymous pervert, whose parallel fifths, tritones, and hidden sharks sent your ears and eyes into simultaneous states of shock.

Imgur user Zewzur / Via imgur.com

11. John Corigliano, who heartlessly punted your entire orchestra into the abyss at this part of The Ghosts of Versailles.

G. Schirmer / Via imgur.com

12. Koji Kondo, composer of the everlasting soundtrack to The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.

Alfred Music / Via reddit.com

13. This unidentified composer, who sadistically delivered every violinist's hell.

Imgur user Zewzur / Via imgur.com

14. Aaaaand John Stump.

Copyright John Stump / Via classicalconvert.com

What composers make your head explode? Leave your answers below!

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