22. The “Sarah Needs A Confidence Boost” Turtlenecks
There are hideous butterfly brooches (her character was unfortunately fond of these on several outfits) and I’m not even sure WHAT to call that pattern …. Really, there are no words, but there is one thing we can learn from Sarah: Do not wear mud-colored clothing when you are madly in love with your sexy coworker.
21. The “Jamie Is Engaged And He Is Still Wearing A Poop-Colored Sweater” Turtleneck
It’s rather unfortunate.
18. The “My Friend Has Just Told Me He’s Going to Wisconsin To Get Laid” Zip-Up Turtleneck Sweater
Comforting when you need to keep your sanity about you, but its reach is little more than functional.
17. The “I’m Going to Cheat On You As Soon As You Leave To Go To A Wedding” Turtleneck
As seen on Jamie’s girlfriend. Plus points for oversized comforts. Minus points for the whole having-sex-with-his-brother thing.
15. The “How Long Have You Been In Love With Karl” Pep Talk Mock Turtleneck
Suitable for moments when you’re trying to figure out how long one of your employees has been in love with another of your employees.
14. The “Daniel Is Slightly Less Depressed” Turtleneck
After overcoming the first phase of the grieving process, the widower moves on to clothing with shape.
13. The “Covert Eavesdropper” Turtleneck
This man thought he would be sneaky in black listening to Karen call Harry out – but he failed.
12. The “I Am Going to Cheat On My Wife, Maybe” Black Turtleneck of Doom
Worn when Snape contemplates buying his slutty secretary a Christmas gift; black like his soul at this particular moment.
9. The “Uncle Jamie’s Here!” Turtleneck
Not for long - it’s OK, though. He’s winter-ready in this tan number.
8. The “Hi, Karl” Turtleneck Sweater
HE’S SO PRETTY.
7. The “Nativity Scene DIY Costume” Turtleneck
Points to Penguin’s mom for reusing an orange turtleneck.
5. The “Sigh, Mia” Black Turtleneck
Gotta hand it to her, though: The girl knows how to find a flattering turtleneck.
3. The “I’m Claudia Schiffer And I Look Brilliant In Everything, Especially Thick Woolen Layers” Blue Turtleneck
2. The “This Precious Angel Just Wants You To Sing Her Christmas Carols” Turtleneck
Guaranteed to melt even the biggest Scrooge’s heart this holiday season.