1. The mild temperature might inspire you to eat ... outside.
2. And there is nothing worse than Happy Hour on a patio.
3. All that extra serotonin from the extra sunlight hours could basically turn you into a monster.
4. Ice cream trucks are the lamest kind of truck.
5. Your entirely inconsiderate friends might rope you into a beach trip.
6. Which will inevitably lead to bonfires.
7. And there is probably nothing in this world more disgusting than a s'more.
8. Summer romance is so played out.
9. All lemonade and sweet tea are good for is wrecking your bladder.
10. Napping in the sun is so overrated.
11. Fireworks are trying way too hard to be cool.
12. And rainbows are basically glorified light pollution.
13. Same goes for fireflies.
14. Summer fruit is generally so unappetizing.
15. Slip 'n slides are lackluster at best.
16. Road trips are boring and unfulfilling.
17. Basically the whole charade is an ugly hot mess.
18. In conclusion, summer, you are not welcome here.
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