21 Things That Happen When You Live Alone

As well as being surrounded by cats, naturally

1. You talk to yourself

2. You sing, loudly and a lot

3. And dance around, really badly

4. You can take as long in the shower as you want

5. You can eat as much as you like and no one will judge

6. Bills are huge because there’s no one to share with

7. Netflix is your best friend

In fact, you probably have more interaction with Netflix than anyone else

8. When people visit, you don’t let them leave

9. And when you visit others, you stay way longer than is polite

10. You keep the place clean and tidy in the hope you’ll get visitors

11. And also because you can’t blame anyone else for the mess

12. There’s no one else to empty the bins

On the plus side, they fill up way slower when there’s only one of you

13. If you don’t answer the door to the postman, no one will

14. Bumps in the night (or even the day) are terrifying

15. You jump whenever there’s a knock at the door

16. You can wander around naked as much (or as little) as you like

17. Every dinner is a TV dinner

18. You can go days without seeing a single person

So much so that occasionally you say something just to check your voice still works

19. If the internet breaks, you feel incredibly isolated

20. Sometimes you get so bored, you work

21. But whenever anyone asks if you get lonely living alone, you lie

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