10 Dartmouth "Alumni" Who Never Went To Dartmouth

They might not be real people, but they really have the "granite of New Hampshire in their muscles and their brains."

1. Meredith Grey - Grey's Anatomy

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Is Cristina snuggling up to her because she's her person, or because she's jealous of Mer's shirt?

2. Dr. Stephen T. Colbert - The Colbert Report

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Where do you think he learned to be afraid of bears?

3. Michael Corleone - The Godfather

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^spoken like someone who took Tuck Accounting.

4. Peter Prentice - The Mindy Project

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That episode with Shonda though.

5. Pete Campbell - Mad Men

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The kind of guy who'd bring up his frat in every. single. conversation.

6. Jed Bartlet - The West Wing

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Technically a professor, not an alum, but we'll claim him. (Despite the fact that he called it "Dartmouth University." Do better, Jed.)

7. David Rosen - Scandal

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Shonda, your '91 is showing.

8. Howie Archibald - Gossip Girl

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Remember that time he almost pressured Nate into going to Dartmouth? Still upset Columbia got him.

9. Trapper John McIntyre - M*A*S*H

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Big Green football gave him an -ahem- interesting injury.

10. Jack Trainer - Working Girl

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YUP. WE'LL TAKE HIM.