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    12 Things No Woman Should Ever Feel Bad About

    Go out and get what you deserve, girl.

    1. Being the one to make decisions about your body.


    Your body, and therefore every choice you make relating to it, is yours. Whether you favour hair removal, decide to take the pill or rely on other contraceptive methods, take medication for physical or mental health, cover your face in make-up or don't wear a scrap, as well as the food you eat, the exercise you do, and every single decision relating to your uterus, it is all solely down to you. Don't let anyone else tell you anything otherwise.

    2. Sex

    A friend of mine recently told me that after turning down a guy's offer to go back to his place and have sex with him after their first date, he got irritated and called her "boring." I don't know what annoyed me more - the fact he'd gone on a date with the belief that it was his god-given right to have sex at the end of it, or making her feel guilty for saying no.

    It seems we just can't win, because if you want to have, or god forbid, enjoy sex, you're judged for that too. I remember telling an ex about one particular hook-up I'd had during uni, and his response was: "Wow, that's not classy." I wanted the ground to swallow me up, and I made a mental note to never mention the story to anyone ever again.

    Reflecting on it now, I wish I'd told him I didn't give a single fuck about his judgement, because it's no longer 1952. If a woman wants to have sex and enjoys the experience, or decides she just isn't feeling it and says no, then it's her prerogative. And if she turns down someone who's made her feel uncomfortable or walks away from slut-shaming, let's face it: It's really not her loss.

    3. Being selective about friends

    4. Your body changing

    5. Asking for a raise or promotion


    Ever since childhood, we're generally not encouraged or even given the opportunity to speak our minds. If we do speak up, whether it's in the playground or in the workplace, we're often left with the label "bossy" and "unlikeable." Whereas men are respected for being ambitious and confident at work, it's not the same for women. As a result, we often end up putting ourselves down and minimising our ambitions.

    Often we'll take a backseat or not speak our minds for fear of appearing "too assertive." Sometimes men will repeat our ideas and claim them as their own. Other times, they'll straight-up talk over us. And, unlike men, we often lower our salary expectations because we're worried we won't get the job, or in pay reviews fail to ask for what we think we deserve because we don't want to be seen as greedy.

    We have to stop reducing our potential, start recognising our professional achievements, and begin asking for what we truly believe we're worth - because I can bet it's a whole lot more than we're currently giving ourselves credit for.

    6. Not being ~OK~ all of the time.

    It may be a cliché, but we all have days where we just want to curl up, make a duvet fort, eat chocolate, watch something trashy on TV, and not face the world. Sometimes there's a tangible reason for why you're feeling down, other days you can't put your finger on it. On those days, it's important to be kind to yourself. Get through the hours where you have to communicate with other humans, but if you feel that all you want to do is cancel your evening plans, crawl home, sack off the healthy eating, have a bath, and find something comforting to watch on Netflix, then you're allowed to.

    And, you know what? It's all right to cry too. Don't dismiss your emotions on the basis that you don't have anything to be upset over, or that other people have it worse. Everything is relative, and you're allowed to have moments where you just feel emotional. Go to bed in the knowledge that tomorrow is a brand-new day.

    7. Not being in a relationship.

    8. Comparing yourself with other women

    It's very easy to find yourself comparing yourself with the women around you, as well as those you don't know on social media. But unless you're speaking to a select few people who are completely honest with you about their lives, it's unlikely you're comparing yourself with reality.

    There's a phrase: "Don't compare your behind the scenes with someone else's highlights reel," and it couldn't be more true. You don't see the moments behind closed doors that actually make up real life – the colleague who seems to have a perfect relationship in a screaming match with her boyfriend, the friend who jokes about always being skint, but really does struggle to make ends meet each month. The moments where we stand, picking ourselves apart in front the mirror, the times we've cried over heartbreak or work, or questioned just where the hell our lives are going. Those are the real-life moments that aren't spoken about openly. And they're certainly not captured, filtered, and sent out onto Instagram either.

    Comparing ourselves with other people is an inevitable part of life, but it shouldn't make you feel bad about your own. Because when you're wondering why you don't quite compare with another woman, it's likely she's had the exact same thought about you.

    9. Being confident

    We often suppress our confidence for a multitude of reasons, often because we're concerned about how other people perceive us. But sometimes it's important to disregard the opinions of other people.

    If you want to say no to a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable, say no. If you feel you have achieved something noteworthy at work, tell your boss. If you're feeling your look, take that selfie. Whatever your size or shape, wear any outfit you desire. Who cares what anyone else thinks. You're amazing, so be proud of who you are.

    10. Making decisions about your body and future based on what you want.


    Every now and again, a report will come around, saying something along the lines of women needing to think about starting a family before the age of 30 for fertility reasons, and it'll scare the living daylights out of you.

    It's like that scene in Friends, where Rachel turns 30 and freaks out that in order to fulfil her ~life plan~ of being settled with a baby by the age of 35, she'd have to marry the guy she was with right now. And she had no plans to settle down with Tag. Feeling pressured to plan out your life this way when we're already juggling so much feels like a huge pressure that is both stressful and unrealistic.

    We all know that decisions about our bodies and the future will involve a lot of time and thought. But whether you want to prioritise family over your career, or feel that professional goals are more important than babies, or know that you want a family but haven't met the right person yet, or you just LITERALLY DON'T HAVE A CLUE, it's OK.

    The decision is yours and yours alone, and you can make it in your own time based on your life, your body, and your choices.

    11. Past relationships.

    12. Not having everything ~together~

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