10 Reasons "Doug" Was The Worst Thing To Happen To Dougs Everywhere

Talk to any Doug you know of a certain age, they will have a complicated relationship with the Nickelodeon/Disney Show. Damn you, Jim Jinkins.

1. You introduce yourself to some new people, they instinctively have to sing the theme song

Please stop

2. “We’re all dressing up like superheroes; you can be Quailman”

Sorry, I will be going as the Blue Power Ranger. My underwear will remain inside my pants.

3. People instinctively think you are a shy, artistic, clumsy person

No, I am in fact not exactly the same as an animated fictional character.

To be fair, Pizza is pretty good, though

4. “You have a girlfriend? What’s her name? Patti Mayonnaise?”

Speaking of Which…

5. “My dog is not named Porkchop.”

6. “My best friend is neither blue nor named Skeeter.”

7. “I’m not from Bluffington.”

8. “The Beets are not my favorite band.”

And, of course…

9. “My last name is not Funnie.”

Please stop asking.


10. Roger Klotz is still the worst.


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