1.
"Wowsers, this is kind of exciting!"
2.
"OK, gotta remember..."
"...pick up some TP and AA batteries after work today."
3.
"Oh, and let's finally try those Sofritas at Chipotle for lunch."
4.
"I wonder what Biden's up to, lol."
5.
"Alrighty, here we go! First president to get..."
7.
"The Martians... are not... invaders."
10.
"His name... is Boner... not... Boehner."
11.
"Must... send... shout-out... to... pears."
"OK, that's all for today, Mr. President!"
13.
"Great, thanks guys. Chipotle time!"
"No, thank you... Mr. President."