"I'm just going to hit snooze one time."
"I'm just going to hit snooze one more time."
"Sleep is more important than breakfast."
"Seriously, I'm getting up in five minutes. It's okay if I leave a little bit late, there won't be much traffic anyway."
"I'm a creative, intelligent person and creative, intelligent people never arrive on time."
"These fishnets are totally work-appropriate."
"Ditching my packed lunch to join my coworkers for lunch is such a good idea. Team bonding and all that."
"I'm only going to have four tortilla chips, and definitely no guacamole."
"This afternoon is going to fly by."
"Snickers are healthier than Hershey's Kisses because they have peanuts."
"Snacking throughout the day is good for my metabolism."
* grabs another Snickers *
"I'm not going to look at the clock for an entire hour."
"Crap. Okay, seriously not looking at the clock again today."
"That clock is broken."
"I didn't make it to the gym this morning, so I'm definitely going after work."
"There's really no difference between me leaving at 4:52 and me leaving at 5 on the dot, so, I'm outtie."
"Traffic was really harsh, I wouldn't have made it to the gym anyway."
"It's so great that I chose a healthy dinner since I've had zero time to work out today."
* drizzles avocado lime ranch dressing on Chick-Fil-A salad *
* A group text about going out tonight comes through *
"I'll just meet them for two drinks and call it a night."
"Ugh, forgot to get gas. Well, the indicator just hit 'E' so I can make it at least another day without filling up."
"There's no way I'll get a parking ticket in this neighborhood."
"I'd be stupid not to take advantage of late night happy hour. Two margaritas for me!"
"Man, I'm saving so much money by taking advantage of this deal. Two more, please!"
"One more drink, then I'm out of here. None of these people are attractive anyway."
"Okay that bartender is kiiiinda cute now that I've had more time to think about it."
"The bartender is into me. Most definitely."
"I'll make time to fill up my gas tank before work tomorrow."
"I'm just going to spend two minutes on Reddit."
"I'm so going to the gym when I wake up."