50 Times Total Strangers On The Internet Totally, Completely, 100% Nailed Their Response Last Month

    Now that's clever.

    1. On the 50 states:

    "Tell me what state you are from with two words" Answer: From Connecticut

    2. On staples:

    "Fuck iron supplements i'm bout to just start eating staples"; "What if your allergic to fruit?" "man what... i said staples"

    3. On asking the tough questions:

    4. On deer:

    Person posts a picture of their car with white splotches on passenger side door, with message "Deer were using my car as a salt lick" and comment: "'Deer: Where do you want to go eat tonight?' Other deer: 'Outback?'"

    5. On being forgotten:

    "Tell that to my great great uncle"

    6. On only children:

    "they don't have any siblings"

    7. On celebrities:

    Ask Reddit: People who've had sex with celebrities, how was it? "Great until they kicked me out of the wax museum"

    8. On books:

    "The dictionary"

    9. On the countries of the world:

    "They are all red"

    10. On bodybuilding:

    "No it made him a daughter"

    11. On pizza:

    "Polonium"

    12. On censorship:

    "I'm going to shatter you like glass"

    13. On purchases:

    "Listen here you little shit"

    14. On Tokyo:

    "tokyo is in japan, not england"

    15. On workdays:

    "If i work in childcare and my 6 hours were up..."

    16. On hikes:

    "I think 'take a hike' is like the funniest response to someone; like dude just get outta here and go experience the wonder of nature for a bit" "ancestral form of touch grass"

    17. On Canada:

    "People not from Canada, how do you see the average Canadian?" "By traveling to Canada"

    18. On bees:

    "i cant express how much i hate fucking bees" "then stop fucking bees???? it's really a simple solution" "YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT" "Not after bee movie we don't"

    19. On lying:

    What's the worst lie you were told as a kid? "My mom would always tell me I was the 'easiest physical birth out of all of the kids'; I felt proud until at the age of 18 I was told I was adopted"

    20. On babies:

    "Someone please quickly explain baby clothing sizes to me" "baby clothes are smaller than most adult or even childrens clothes; i hope this helps"

    21. On roommates:

    "Sometimes the only way i know my roommate is still alive is the $30 cheese that appears and disappears from our fridge" "Mouse roommate" "rat behavior"

    22. On the year 2000:

    "people born in 2000 should be like 12-14 now but they're not; that's how fucked up our world is now" "The older this post gets the funnier it becomes"

    23. On capitalization:

    "in elementary school, i thought the reason to capitalize the first letter of people's names was as a sign of respect, so i refused to capitalize the name of my fourth grade teacher or george bush because i did not respect them" "lower case (derogatory)"

    24. On traps:

    Cat is in a cage trap outdoors, with comment "my stepdad is waging war against a raccoon and his cat Sinatra is consistently the only casualty" response: "The cat looks so confused as to how this could possibly happen once again"

    25. On preparations:

    "You have 5 minutes to prepare before a guy breaks into your house with the intention to kill you; you cannot exit your house; what is your strategy to survive?" "Go to the LIVING ROOM"

    26. On cats:

    A cat being held above an overturned plant pot with soil all over the floor, with caption "Did you just unearth a cat from a pot of soil" "the harvest is bountiful this year"

    27. On goth couples:

    "Every january goth couples are fucking hard to try and have a halloween baby they're gonna name ophelia or some shit" "i'm a Halloween baby but my parents are normal so I'm Garrett" "Hi garrett"

    28. On atheism:

    What are your views on atheism? "It's a non-prophet organization"

    29. On fun facts:

    What's a fun little fact about yourself? "I turned 11 on 11/11/11 Edit: 11/11/11 for the non-Americans" and comment: "That edit is hilarious"

    30. On movies:

    Reddit question: What movie made you walk out of the theater? "I walked out of every movie I ever went to see, usually during or after the credits"

    31. On states:

    Map of the USA with caption "Post a state without an 'a' in its name"; response: "Liquid"

    32. On goats:

    "u have a fundamental misunderstanding of how yarn is made"

    33. On flowers:

    "Wow you are not ready to hear about trees."

    34. On jumping:

    "Do you even remember the last time you jumped?"

    35. On pronunciation:

    "Either is correct."

    36. On the last decade:

    "My lower back"

    37. On glasses:

    "People without glasses are really out here seeing for free"

    38. On chickens:

    "To get to the other side"

    39. On the ocean:

    "water"

    40. On shrimp:

    "No they look like they're dead"

    41. On dangerous animals:

    "T-Rex, never hurt a human before."

    42. On birds:

    "They're birds of pray."

    43. On skeletons:

    "I never needed to think about this..."

    44. On dinner:

    "6 counting popeye"

    45. On movies today:

    "You couldn't make American psycho today because Christian Bale would actually kill Jared Leto for real"

    46. On procrastination:

    "i'll clap later"

    47. On illegal activities:

    "Change it to 100 pennies, put them into a sock and beat someone to death with it"

    48. On nuclear attacks:

    "Die lol"

    49. On heartbeats:

    "Especially if you are dead"

    50. And on hieroglyphs:

    "Attention, followers: you now know how to write 'nice ass' in hieroglyphics."