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    For Everyone Still Haunted By That Fucking Shirley Temple Informercial

    MONKEYS AND RABBITS LOOP DE LOOP.

    It's been years. Years since you even thought about it. Years since you were just casually watching TV and the informercial started. Years since you've had these words trapped inside your head:

    ANIMAL. CRACKERS. IN. MY. SOUP.

    Years since you've thought about "AMERICA'S SWEETHEART...NOW IN FULL COLOR!!!!"

    But the memory remains.

    And the animal crackers will never go away.

    Three words continue to haunt you. "Exclusive. TV. Offer."

    "OH. MY. GOODNESS."

    You begin to think crazy thoughts. Can your duck lay an egg?

    CAN YOU LAY AN EGG????

    LIFE IS BUT AN EXCLUSIVE. TV. OFFER.

    The animal crackers won't go away. THE MONKEYS AND RABBITS BECOME AN EXTENSION OF YOUR BEING.

    The Little Darling collection is buried in your mind:

    The laugh stays with you.

    It haunts you. The animal crackers haunt you.

    WHAT AM I? WHO AM I? WHAT IS THIS LIMITED TIME OFFER?

    Animals crackers...monkeys and rabbits...

    ANIMAL CRACKERS IN MY SOUP? ANIMAL. CRACKERS. IN. MY. SOUP.

    18 CLASSIC FILMS. 18 CLASSIC SOUPS? ANIMAL CRACKERS? 18 ANIMAL CRACKERS IN SOUPS.

    WATCH AND REMEMBER:

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