15 Things Men Can Do To Show The World They're Engaged
You're not wearing a ring. But shouldn't you be able to brag a little anyway?
Congrats on your engagement! Now you've got to show off the big news. The mangagement ring is a cool option, but if that's not your style, that's OK! We've got other totally reasonable ways for you to tell the world how excited you are to get married!
1. Start every new conversation with, “So I just got engaged…”
Don't hide your big news! People love when you hijack a conversation from the start and make it all about you!
2. Wear a fancy watch.
Whenever someone asks you what time it is, just tell them, "Almost time for me to get married!"
3. Grow a fu manchu.
Forget mustaches. What are you, single? Let the world know you're a man — and an engaged man at that! — with some super cool facial hair.
4. Bring in vagina-shaped cookies for everyone at your office.
She's going to be drinking out of a penis straw at the bachelorette party — why shouldn't you get into some genitalia-based fun, too?
5. Start wearing an “I’m with her” necklace around at all times.
Bonus points for getting one made with Puka shells.
6. If that’s too low-key, get sunglasses with “Already taken!” written across the front.
The secret is to never take them off. If it works for Bono, it can work for you.
7. Constantly grab at your ring finger as though you’re playing with an invisible wedding band.
When someone asks you what you're doing, just tell them you're practicing for the inevitable fidgeting you'll be doing with your ring soon.
8. Wear a T-shirt with your engagement Instagram silkscreened on it.
The key is to showcase the entire Instagram — that way people know you got engaged AND know how many likes you got on that photo. Don't be bashful!
9. Glitterize everything!
Buy a few pounds of glitter off Etsy, and every morning, pack a few ounces of glitter into each nostril. Every time you sneeze, you'll cover everyone with a little bit of magic! (And mucus. But mostly magic!) Turn that sneeze into a sneeze-a-bration!
10. Tie some “Just Engaged” bottles to the back of your car.
Save the cans for the wedding — plastic bottles make a more subtle statement for an engagement.
11. Send yourself 10,000 balloons that say “Team Groom” on them.
The key is to have a balloon messenger keep bringing you new balloons every couple of hours, so the balloons (like your love) never deflate.
12. Have your fiancé endorse you on LinkedIn as a "Proposal Expert."
Just make sure you update your skills to "Marriage Expert" after the wedding!
13. Hire the guys from Train to play that one song of theirs about marriage every time you enter the room.
Nothing says romance like Train!
14. Buy one of those big “National Debt” countdown clocks and sync it to your bank account to show everyone how broke you’ll be once this wedding is over.
As a bonus, maybe your co-workers will take pity on you and buy you lunch (assuming that any are left after the vagina cookie buffet).
15. Get her face tattooed on your face.
Are you in it to win it or not?