1. If you ever have inappropriate sex, you will immediately be impregnated.
2. Hang around the village long enough and you will develope hitherto undetected homosexual tendencies.
3. Seriously, at this rate there will be no heterosexuals left.
4. Do not mess with Tom. The child is invincible.
5. Murderers generally escape unpunished.
6. The village is widely populated by former residents of Weatherfield, Walford and Brookside Close.
7. These two are going to feel really awkward when they realise they are actually father and son.
8. The dead rarely stay dead for long.
9. Familial generation gaps are shorter than the UK average.
10. See also this one.
11. A lot of people just don't get the bleeding obvious.
12. Blonde women are either murderous...
13. ...or excessively virtuous.
There can be no inbetween.