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321 Thoughts I Had About Friends While Watching For The First Time

14. Ross IS DOUBLE FISTING! It’s gonna get weird.

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"I've actually never seen an episode of Friends before".

My roommates and I had just move in, and we were setting up the DVD shelf. I had noticed one of my roommates was unloading box set after box set of Friends seasons. She had to stop unloading after I said that. She was another one of the people I've met who are shocked of my lack of Friends knowledge. Once I saw that all 10 seasons of Friends were coming to Netflix on January 1st, I made big plans for New Years Day.

Before Friends finally came to Netflix, I knew barely anything about Friends., I didn't know anything about the characters. I didn't know how they knew each other, what they did for work, or what they do in their free time. I mean, they all lived in probably nice apartments in New York City, so they're probably doing pretty well, right? I also knew my roommate was obsessed with Friends, as evident by the multitude of DVD box sets she has.

I knew I couldn't watch the entire series quickly. So I decided to watch just the first season. That should give me a good insight into the characters and what I like and dislike about them. So, after sleeping on on New Years Day, I started up Netflix, found Friends, and pressed play.

In case it wasn't clear, I got the idea for this article from Jarett Wieselman's "293 Thoughts I Had While Watching 'Gilmore Girls' For The First Time".

1. That stupid, addicting, awesome guitar riff.

2. They just ruined all their nice clothes!

3. "Does he eat chalk"? Phoebe is so quirky.

4. Joey in a leather jacket. That means he's the cool one, right?

5. Wow, thanks for the visual about your intestines, Ross.

6. Phoebe also does aura cleansing. she's so quirky!!!

7. Oh, so Rachel meets everyone in the first episode. I definitely did not know that. Also, she totally left some dude on the altar.

8. Why did Ross, a complete stranger, add sweet and low and mix Rachel's coffee? Didn't he just meet her?

9. Man, that's a bright apartment. It's like, neon bright.

10. Why don't i watch spanish novellas with my friends and guess what they're trying to say? Seems like not a waste of time.

11. Rachel finally acting normally...by hyperventilating and being annoyed by Phoebe.

12. Joey has great timing...hitting on Rachel while she's still hyperventilating.

13. Monica's suspenders...i can't even.

14. Ross IS DOUBLE FISTING! It's gonna get weird.

15. Ross was married? I definitely was distracted by all the bright colors.

16. Probably not a good idea to bring up your sexual inadequacies to someone you're dating...but hey, whatever floats your boat.

17. What is this? A dramatic music video? Rachel just staring into the sky? So cheesy!

18. Oh my God. Monica's shoes, socks...basically, her entire outfit, especially the sweater around the waist.

19. Ok, so Joey is an actor. Good to know. I wonder how he can afford his sleeveless shirts.

20. Is Rachel from Earth? She's never heard of a job?

21. Monica is a chef. That's where she gets money for her so obvious 90s fashion.

22. So Monica had an outfit on in the morning, went to work, and then changed back into that same outfit.

23. What Ross is essentially saying: "Hey, i know you ditched your fiance like two days ago, but do you want to go out?"

24. Is "grabbing the spoon" a euphemism?

25. Central perk's coffee cups are massive. Starbucks should take note.

Moment of the episode: Rachel on the phone, saying that she got the answering machine again. Man, this show is so 90s.

26. I haven't even started the episode. Now i know how it ends #spoileralert

27. What kind of concert opens with a stand-up comedian, and then goes to Pink Floyd?

28. Ok, maybe Ross is over-thinking the lives of his mannequin cavemen.

29. Ross's ex wife is pregnant. DUN-DUN-DUN!

30. To be honest, Chandler did accurately explain every Three's Company episode to be produced.

31. Chandler referencing "I've been working on the railroad" in casual conversation. Doesn't happen often nowadays.

32. Ross's double breasted denim shirt. Why did that ever go out of style?

33. Oh, so that's the sonogram at the end.

34. She's been on screen for like a minute, and i already don't care about Monica's mom. No mom is really that catty.

35. Actually, i don't like the dad, either. Calling his daughter fat and lazy….Oh, and totally defending the glass ceiling.

36. It's only the second episode, but i can see the very beginning of The Rachel.

37. So, which would you do? Give the engagement ring back to the fiance you deserted, or go to the pregnant ex-wife's ultrasound?

38. Oh my God. More sappy music with Ross and Rachel. Oh but this time she put her head on his hand. Progress!

39. Susan is the ex-wife's partner. White shoes, white socks, pink flowery dress. Just stop it.

40. "That opens my cervix." I'm now OK with not eating for a while.

41. Barry is a Mets fan? Well, i can see why he got dumped.

42. Ross playing with the OB/GYN models reminds me of the 40 year old virgin scene.

43. Why doesn't anyone wear tank tops under overalls? That's my jam right there.

44. Monica acted like i did when i found out i was going to be an uncle: shock and a lot of almost ugly-crying.

Moment: To be fair, Joey was doing nothing wrong. The lasagna was perfectly fine, even after everyone put their disgusting hands in it to root around for Rachel's ring.

45. Monica with the overalls. Such a good look. It's like mom jeans for your whole body.

46. Ross is a grown man, and just now learns that his dog died. that would be a big realization...if it wasn't for the lesbian pregnant ex-wife.

47. Watching matt leblanc acting like Joey acting like one of his characters. It's like acting inception.

48. Looking back on it, this extended scene of how to look cool smoking probably wasn't the best idea.

49. Really, Ross? Iced tea at a coffee shop? That's like ordering a hamburger at a sushi place.

50. Rewarding not smoking with smoking makes less sense than Monica's fashion sense.

51. This was back in the days when smoking and non-smoking were sections of restaurants. All the way back in the early 90s.

52. FOOTBALL PHONE!

53. Poland Spring product placement for the win.

54. You know you're weird when homeless people call you weird.

55. Chandler's office space looks like the office space from Office Space...except for the random stuff everywhere. A smoking sign, rubber chicken, Blue Jays hat, etc.

56. Shouldn't Monica be wearing a hairnet at her job? I mean, the hair looks good, but i don't want that in my food.

57. YES! LAMB CHOP!

58. Paul with the line of the episode: "I can't stand your friends." Because who could stand a group of 5 needy, over-emotional, codependent overgrown kids?

Moment: Phoebe bribing Chandler to quit smoking. That's a good lesson. Kids, take up smoking and only quit when your friends give you money.

59. Now for everyone's favorite game: "If I Were Omnipotent For A Day".

60. The Friends beginning is perfect primer about how to dance terribly.

61. Phoebe and my grandmother share something in common: falling asleep in public places.

62. Jeez, Phoebe's a downer. I don't need to hear about mine shaft disasters.

63. Oh my God. I think I've just met the 90s version of the Woo girls: Rachel's friends.

64. I hope that, in the future, I don't act like a total debbie downer on the anniversary of consummating a relationship.

65. STOP EVERYTHING. PHOEBE'S ONESIE. HORIZONTAL STRIPES.

66. Jeez, Rachel complaining about everyone getting engaged and married and starting families. This show hits close to home.

67. Ross got hit with the puck. i don't feel bad at all about laughing uproariously at his misfortune.

68. Monica's place is right next to George Stephanopoulos...She must be making bank as a chef.

69. That's the 2nd pitcher of generic pink rum drink. LETS GET WEIRD! LETS GET WEIRD!

70. Oh, so that's where Richard Hamilton got the idea for the face mask during sporting events.

Moment: What were Rachel's friends doing? Where are they from? Where did they shop? What was their purpose?!....I mean, other than to guilt trip her.

71. Why does it have to be East German detergent? Couldn't it just be German? Wasn't communism over by the early 90s?

72. Joey sitting in his chair turned around. now you know he means business.

73. This conversation is about the difference between men and women...Pretty sure there's a stand-up comedy routine in there somewhere.

74. Phones with antennas….#throwback

75. Breaking up using a note. is Chandler like 5 years old? I mean, I wouldn't be mad. It would explain a lot.

76. Did Ross just try to go on a date with Rachel to the laundromat? talk about romantic.

77. did Rachel just agree to a date with Ross at the laundromat?!?

78. Joey using Monica to impress a girl in order to win her back...classic sitcom plot rife with comedy.

79. Joey with the grey on grey suit...looking pretty fly. It was the 90s, so people still said fly.

80. OH MAN. I WANT THOSE BULLWINKLE SOCKS.

81. Oh God. Chandlers girlfriend is like a poor mans Fran Drescher.

82. This episode was in 1994. I wonder if Angela's boyfriend's fashion sense knows the 80s is over.

83. Calm down, Rachel. It's just laundry. It doesn't mean you can do everything. Maybe tackle one obstacle at a time.

84. All of Rachel's clothes are now pink. Well, she would probably fit in with all the other awful clothes in this show.

85. Oh wow. Looks like the laundromat is a pretty good place for a date. I should take a cue from Ross.

Moment: So Monica and Joey went on a double date with two people they wanted for themselves. Joey wanted Angela and Monica wanted the boyfriend. They must be master manipulators if they destroyed that relationship while simultaneously pursuing and ending up with the very people they wanted in the first place.

Long story short, Monica and Joey are evil and should not be trusted.

86. Why hasn't Sigmund Freud: The Musical been produced on Broadway? Someone get Andrew Lloyd Weber on the phone.

87. Hey! the first use of the Chandler phrase.."Could she been more out of my league?"

88. So girls will go on a date knowing just your name? I just assumed girls need to know more than that.

89. Chandler's vests are ridiculous. Just putting it out there.

90. I can't blame the group. I'd fall asleep just as quickly during a paleontology discussion.

91. OH MAN STOP THE PRESSES! RACHEL CLEANED THE APARTMENT!

92. Monica and I have all same answers to the questions the group is posing. WHO DOESN'T USE A COASTER!?!

93. Um, does Chandler does have anything in his fridge? He needs to borrow basic stuff like orange juice and eggs.

94. So Aurora has like 4 or 5 different guys she hooks up with. after spending time with all those guys, how much time does she have left for acting?

95. So Joey had just one job with no lines, and he still got fired? His butt must really suck at acting.

96. PICK UP YOUR DAMN SHOES, MONICA!

Moment: Monica talking to herself about getting her shoes. Not only is she mentally unstable and worried about shallow friends, but her bed looks like the most comfy thing ever.

97. Pre-episode, I'm thinking this blackout will be a lot more bright and cheerful than New York's last blackout.

98. Um, how does a blackout affect Chandler's ability to open doors?

99. Well, at least there's a hot girl for distraction.

100. All those candles probably isn't a good idea with all of Courtney Cox's hairspray.

101. Chandler just casually posing in the dark corner by the ATM machine...That's not creepy at all.

101. So do we ever get to meet ugly naked guy across the street?

102. Does this girl Jill have a cell phone? She's so technologically advanced.

103. Everyone's favorite game, "Weirdest Place You've Had Sex". Ross is totally unfazed by his sister's sexual exploits...and vice-versa.

104. "Do you want gum" "Is it sugarless?" At least Chandler also thinks he's stupid. Good thing I'm not alone.

105. Joey with the tucked in shirt with no belt...Wait, is that one of Rachel's pink shirts from her laundry?

106. Both Ross and Rachel wear double-breasted denim...they're so made for each other.

107. "Hey, I just met you in the hallway, but come meet all of my friends, even though you don't speak English."

108. Chewing another person's gum...that's a pretty good way to get Ebola.

109. "I know we don't have anything in common, but"...Yeah, because all good relationships start out like that.

110. So that's how people entertained themselves at a bank...during a blackout...without cell phones. How archaic.

Moment: I'm not an expert, but if a beautiful woman kissed me on the cheek and said she had a good time, I'd least ask for her number to text her...oh wait.

111. Well at least Chandler knows what he wants in a woman...co-dependent and self-destructive, both such good qualities

112. I caught myself clapping during the opening theme. It took 7 episodes.

113. OK, so Ross and Chandler are college friends.

114. I remember phone antennas. Does that make me old?

115. Remember when Whatsapp wasn't a thing and you had to call people to talk to them when abroad?

116. Apparently, Ross is so repulsing, he brings people back from the dead.

117. Wait, nevermind. She's dead

118. Rachel again with the overalls. If this show was so popular, why didn't overalls become as popular as the Rachel haircut?

119. OK, audience. Phoebe isn't that funny. Calm down a bit.

120. I do a lot of things that sound fun, but being buried at sea is not one of those things.

121. Chandler is getting needlessly defensive about which male co-worker he could hook up with.

122. Chest of drawers in a closet. One storage space in another storage space for more storage space. Sounds like the Xzibit meme.

123. Ross and Monica's nana would've been a good candidate for Hoarders with her sweet-n-low collection.

124. OH GOD CHANDLER AND HIS SCARF!

125. Joey bringing a portable TV to listen to football. There was not an app for that yet

126. Wait, Chandler got rid of his scarf...and he instantly met a beautiful woman. See, that's what happens when you don't dress ridiculously.

127. The lesson is obvious: take lots of pain pill and BECOME HILARIOUS!!

Moment: First, who is that lady? Someone's sister? Second, Sally Jesse Raphael called. She wants her glasses back.

128. At this point, it isn't necessary to always show the Central Perk sign when having a scene at Central Perk.

129. Phoebe rocking the half-ponytail, half straight hair. Good thing that has fallen out of fashion.

130. I also want Joey to contract Lyme Disease.

131. Susan is rocking the mom jeans even before the baby is born. Well at least she's planning ahead.

132. I wonder if they'll talk about the anti-fascist themes in Yurtle the Turtle.

tomato soup, grilled cheese, and Funyuns. now THAT'S a thanksgiving meal!

133. A woman thought Joey had VD and was repulsed by it. I haven't laughed that hard at any episode so far.

134. Wow. A blossom reference. Can this show get even more 90s?

135. Yes, i know i used a phrase from a 90s show which made reference to another 90s TV show.

136. There's no need to fear, a giant balloon is here!

137. Susan kind of looks like a cross between Jenna Fischer and Vanessa Bayer.

138. I think the baby is kicking to make Ross stop his terrible singing.

139. It took Ugly Naked Guy and Gal for the group to realize how selfish they're being. How sweet.

140. Why would someone not tell you that they've won three Tony Awards? I'd be shouting it from the rooftops.

Moment: So Rachel had a lot of things to bring to Vale. Did no one see that rifle she wanted to bring...onto a plane?

141. Ross lives by himself in a new york city apartment? I had no idea paleontology was so lucrative.

142. Phoebe is the first and only acoustic-emo act I've ever seen.

143. Rachel's shirt should probably cover her shoulders if she doesn't want to catch frostbite

144. OH MAN IT'S HANK AZARIA HITTING ON PHOEBE!

145. Well, I would snap too if my closed had as many vests as Chandler's.

146. I'll let Chandler express how i feel about Joey's Christmas outfit. He's just so articulate.

147. OK. so Hank Azaria is an awkward nerdy physicist. So he's like Sheldon Cooper's dad?

148. Joey met a hot single mom...This was the days before the word MILF was created.

149. YES! Shiny Happy People in the background. I love me some REM.

150. Oh, man. I thought a monkey would be a pretty good wingman.

151. Who brings kids to new years party? Everyone knows things happen at those parties that will scar kids for life.

152. I thought we had seen the last of poor man's Fran Drescher. I was so happy to never hear that laugh again.

153. A wild Matthew Perry forehead vein appeared!

154. Another reason Phoebe is the horse whisperer of relationships: articulating an entire break-up speech single-handedly because Hank Azaria is too much of a nerd.

155. I miss Dick Clark. Ryan Seacrest is a terrible replacement.

Moment: Rachel came back from the airport after a huge fight with some lady, but was still totally happy to dress up and have fun at a new years party? Losing fights tend be kind of a mood killer.

156. That's why you never whistle at a hot guy/girl you randomly meet at a newsstand...because THEY COULD GET HIT BY A CAR!

157. A lawyer/sculptor/dancer. yeah that sounds like a reasonable guess to coma guy's career.

158. Really? Rachel gets on planes with adult romance novels? She must have no shame

159. Morgan Fairchild as Mrs. Bing. Wasn't she married to Jon Lovitz?

160. THE HIGH WAS 45 DEGREES? I don't blame them for staying inside and reading the newspaper to a comatose.

161. Mrs. Bing taking tequila shots. GONNA GET #WHITEGIRLWASTED.

162. Isn't it 1994? Didn't Mrs. Bing know that shoulder-pads are out of fashion?

163. Did Mrs. Bing just spoil the ending to the Rachel-Paolo relationship? I mean, I'm OK with Paolo getting killed off

164. Did Joey just reference the bro code more than 10 years before Barney Stinson?

165. Are Monica and Phoebe really competing for someone in a coma? Do they think it's like investing in a relationship?

166. Phoebe's crescent moon earrings. Would those be a good and not at all gaudy birthday gift to a girl?

167. Is it normal for people to rehearse Greek tragedy plays in the middle of a coffee shop?

168. Who knew waking from a coma and acting normally would drive away Monica and Phoebe? Oh wait...that sounds like something i should've expected from them

169. Rachel doesn't know how to type or is illiterate...either is a cause for concern, but not surprising

Moment: I think I was too young to remember Jay Leno without silver hair. Another example of how old this show is.

170. Whoa. First shot of World Trade Center. Weird.

171. Breaking out into a capella in a coffee shop? Man, these friends are so quirky!

172. Wow. This episode was written by so many people, I couldn't see Ross talk about a uterus.

173. A weekend in the Poconos? Ross and I both thought Paolo was a one time thing.

174. So how long exactly did it take Monica to cook 12 lasagnas in her small 2-bedroom apartment?

175. 2 lasagnas down, 10 to go.

176. Turning a broken table into an accusation of being a crappy roommate...That escalated quickly.

177. It wouldn't be a Friends episode without overalls...Thanks, Monica.

178. Thank you, Phoebe, for the visual of Paolo's massive erection.

179. Joey's big white shirt is clearly missing a button.

180. Wouldn't a foosball table be more expensive and less useful than an actual table?

181. So Paolo's looks somehow explains why he made a move on Phoebe?

182, OK, so Joey is catholic.

183. 4 down, 8 to go...and that's it. still 8 more lasagnas to give away

Moment: In the most realistic and mature behavior of the episode, Ross freaks out, then is speechless upon learning that he will have a boy.

184. Is Chandler taking a juice box from Monica's fridge? Couldn't he have maybe waited a day and gone to the store?

185. Phoebe seems like guys with really obnoxious glasses frames.

186. Phoebe's boyfriend is like Sherlock.

187. Joey premiering the much-improved hairstyle. Looks much less emo.

188. Exchanging seeing boobs for seeing a penis doesn't seem like the best trade.

189. I never want to see Phoebe's boyfriend ever again. He's actively destroying the group.

190. JUST LEAVE, RONNIE. NO NORMAL PERSON PREFERS CHEESE NIPS TO CHEEZ-ITS.

191. Cheetah coat and cheetah handbag. Ronnie is nothing if not coordinated.

192. Overalls alert. This time on Rachel...who just really wants to see a penis for some reason.

193. Phoebe's boyfriend just perfectly described the entire group dynamic better than I did.

Moment: I'm not surprised by Monica's shower cap.. How else is her 90s hair going to stay so perfect?

194. The beginning of this episode is just like the episode in Coupling with the Israeli girl.

195. Chandler said "I think it's winning"? So that's where Charlie Sheen learned it from.

195. Well now Chandlers vest is ruined...I'd say that's good news.

196. Poor mans Fran Drescher is back.

197. How did Chandler's surprising Joey in the bathroom not make Joey pee all over his hands?

198. How do a bunch of co-dependent, obsessive, needy people end up with horrible partners? Now, that's a real head-scratcher

195. What restaurant is that? it took like a minute to make three chocolate mousses. 196. The service there is amazing!

197. First date at a hibachi place? I should've been a paleontologist.

198. Burning things in your apartment trash can? HOW IS THAT NOT SETTING OF THE FIRE ALARM?!

199. I can sort of understand why "boyfriend bonfires" never really caught on.

200. Janice's long monologue about Chandler loving her is like the Most Annoying Sound in the World from Dumb and Dumber

201. If the firefighters said they were busy that whole night, why did they stay and chat up the group?

202. They're all cheating on their significant others. I did not that coming.

Moment: Only you can prevent apartment fires.

202. Yummy. Ear-flavored cinnamon stick.

203. Did I miss the episode where Phoebe stabbed someone? I keep seeing it in the credits

204. "I'm inputting my numbers". That's the only thing I've learned about Chandler's job.

205. ….which he just quit

206. I don't really need friends to tell me if my nipples can be seen through my shirt. A mirror works just as well.

207. Evian water product placement...oh wait, it's actually Via.

208. Ross still has the monkey? I thought that was just a one-episode thing just for laughs...Now it's a two-episode thing for laughs.

209. Salmon mousse? I think I threw up in my mouth a little.

210. Is that a rubber shark by Ross's lamp?

211. I'm pretty sure practicing dirty talk to your friend isn't going to improve your dirty talk in any way whatsoever.

212. The background posters in Joey and Chandler's apartment seem more interesting than Joey and Chandler.

213. For quitting and yelling at his boss, Chandler sure has a beautiful office...but still acts immaturely.

214. Sugar-O's; the generic cereal part of an everyday breakfast.

215. James Michener's Dirty Talk: A Novel. Someone should really get on that.

Moment: Lighting a blunt in the back of a cab? Surely, there are less conspicuous ways to smoke weed. Also, JON LOVITZ!!!

216. Whoa new starting! I mean, same bad dancing, but different non-dancing scenes

217. Monkey: Episode 3

218. Oh, that was Phoebe's sister, Ursula. With a name like Ursula, she's probably super evil.

219. Nina messed up Chandler's WENUS. it's funny because it sounds like penis.

220. Marcel turned on the TV, and Family Matters came on. Another reason this show is old.

221. Shouldn't Chandler be doing work and not messing with some random vibrating toy?

222. I feel like bath salts and Phoebe wont be a good mix.

223. That's someone famous. the crowd made a huge noise.

224. THAT'S HELEN HUNT! WHERE'S THE TWISTER?!

225. Does Chandler's work computer screensaver have flying toasters on it?

226. Ursula is a huge jerk to Phoebe. No wonder Ariel and King Triton didn't like her.

Moment: Is it bad that I sort was rooting for Rachel to fall while taking down Christmas lights?

227. Rachel would surely be covered under Obamacare, right?

228. I have great friends, but I don't know if I'd commit insurance fraud for them

229. "You are an idiot." That hospital worker speaks the truth.

230. Ross throws a pass and then tries to catch it? Who is he, Nelson Muntz?

231. EARLY 90'S GEORGE CLOONEY!

232. AW YEAH! MORE REM IN THE BACKGROUND! #WhatsTheFrequencyKenneth

233. Chandler again with the baggy vest.

234. Can Phoebe introduce me to her random friend Betty? She looks like my type.

235. Colonial Williamsburg….Just saying those words makes me drowsy.

236. Yeah, Monica. Just admit to defrauding a hospital. It should turn out alright.

237. Monica should be yelling GET THAT MONKEY OFF MY COUCH.

238. Joey being all introspective with the "love me, love me not" flower petals.

239. "Ursula" is wearing the jacket Phoebe got. Just putting this down before it turns out to be Phoebe.

240. Wait, does this mean Joey and Phoebe will be a thing?

241. OK, Ross. It's just a monkey, not your actual child. Calm down a bit.

Moment: Was it just me, or was Monica wearing a ring on her left ring finger? Did she get married in between episodes?

242. They are oddly good at whistling in unison.

243. If someone thinks the Flintstones could really happen, then that's a big red flag?

244. "Could you want her more?" Second Chandler-ism.

245. Nowadays, they would be playing Texas Hold Em, instead of normal poker.

246. There was a guy in my fraternity who played like Ross when we played poker. We didn't really like that guy.

247. Is that the monkey from Ace Ventura? I mean, he did play "The Lion Sleeps Tonight".

248. TONY RANDALL!!

249. Aunt Iris' suspenders game on strong.

250. First name of Rachel, knew the interviewer's cousin from camp? Is Rachel actually Jewish?

251. It took 18 episodes for someone to comment on another person's fashion when it should have taken about half of one.

252. This poker game is going on for so long. It's like I'm watching it on The Travel Channel.

Moment: Did anyone else notice the GIANT SWORD right by Ross's room?

253. Ross is eating. Please don't go into detail about your sexual desires, Rachel.

254. "Buses going really fast". Didn't speed come out like, that year?

255. Um, did they pat down that pizza yet? It seems like there's so much grease there.

256. 8 slices for 3 people...they're such fatties.

257. What the heck is Rachel wearing? Does she go to a private school?

258. Because only a crazy person would WANT to go to Newark.

259. IT'S MARLA HOOCH FROM A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN!

260. The audience laughed when she mentioned overalls. Do they see how often the characters wear them?

261. Um, were 90s women regularly dressed in cut-off denim shirts and black belts?

262. DEAR GOD, RACHEL. PUT ON SOME PANTS WHEN YOU GO OUTSIDE!

263. Is the monkey a metaphor for Ross? I mean, when the monkey was lost, you could say that Rachel lost Ross. And when the monkey is back, Ross and Rachel are friends again

264. Ok, so they live in a New York City apartment complex...and they don't at least lock their door?

Moment: Here's a tip for the ladies. Don't do what Rachel did; rub the inside of Ross's leg when they were sitting on the couch. It sends all kinds of confusing singles.

265. Get it? A telescope looking at the group? IT'S LIKE THE VIEWERS!

266. Another reference to an answering machine. I don't think I've even seen one since the 90s.

267. Barry's patient is a jerk.

268. Did Joey not see last episode? That must have been Rachel's camp uniform that she was wearing.

269. #PinkPowerSuit

270. Is Rachel really surprised that Barry had a side thing with Mindy? I mean, he went on the honeymoon with her.

271. Not a lot of people use Ingrid Bergman in a compliment.

272. Barry last name is Farber, he's a doctor, and he's acting really neurotic. Maybe he's Jewish, too.

273. Rachel talked about Barry killing Mindy in Aruba. Did Natalie Holloway not watch this?

Moment: This episode began and ended with the most ridiculous debate ever: "Mr. Peanut or Mr. Kernel?". The answer is obviously Mr. Peanut #MonocoleLife

274. 70 bucks for a mop? This was before Swiffers existed.

275. When my card got stolen, I just checked my online banking. It's like a time capsule of pre-Internet days.

276. Joe Piscopo. Joe Pesci. Joe's Crab Shack. Already so many famous Joes.

277. I know she was a bit character, but the first girl you see in the dance class looks just like Lorde. Too bad she was about -2 years old.

278. Really? Tap class in jeans and a coat? Has Monica ever been to any dance class ever?

279. Oh, no. Ross has to give up Marcel. I'm just so sad.

280. HEY, THEY'RE DOING THE MONKEY THING!

281. Yeah, fake Monica is great! Let's forget the credit card fraud worth hundreds of dollars!

282. OH GOD. ANYTHING BUT MEMORIES IN AN AUDITION!

283.SHUT UP FAKE MONICA! OH CAPTAIN, MY CAPTAIN!

284. Harry Shearer...aka Principal Skinner as the weird zookeeper, who apparently runs an animal Thunderdome.

285. Fake Monica is on Rikers. Maybe she'll hang out with Bobby Shmurda.

286. My roommates pointed out Ross's banana pin. Ross's accessories game strong.

Moment: Isn't there only one pope? Why would you need to get multiple of them into a car?

287. Chandler with the slicked-back Greaser look.

288. Phoebe has a lot of rings on. Not really making a comment. Just an observation.

289. Ross has a beeper. By far the most 90s thing I've seen so far. Even more than all the overalls.

290. Great. now Chandler-isms are going to be stuck in my head all week.

291. Who leaves their watch on during sex? Was he timing himself?

292. Oh, THAT'S why he thought gunpoint was a place.

293. A Joan Collins reference. Dynasty was cancelled like 5 years before this episode aired.

294. The strongest power ranger...clearly the red one.

295. NEW HAND DRYERS?? THAT'S MY JAM!

296. dude, your relationship is illegal. THAT'S the problem.

Moment: Wait, didn't Ross fall off the couch and say he was hurt? I guess his limp disappeared quickly.

297. Mucus plug...and there went my appetite.

298. You don't stop for Chunkys, because Chunkys are terrible.

299. I miss Chandler's center part.

300. The second doctor Rachel has hit on. Her Jewish mother would be so proud.

301. Oh, look. It's Leah Remini, pre-King of Queens.

302. That's what happens when you drag people into a random hospital maintenance closet.

303. Whoa. Chandler should stay away from baby crazy Monica.

304. WHY WOULD Ross WANT TO SEE CROWNING?!

305. Just think. That kid is now 20 years old.

306. And there's the soft music. No, I'm not holding in tears. What? I was just thinking of something else. Stop accusing me!

Moment: Phoebe getting out of the air vent would have included enough hijinks for an entire episode.

307. Well the Netflix preview photo totally gave away the ending.

308. What exactly is the hypothesis of Joey's study?

309. Chandler rocking the green plaid vest like a true gangsta.

310. NO ROSS DONT LEAVE!

311. Wait, they don't have Whatsapp to reach Ross in China?

312. Another, better answer to "China, the country?" would be "No. China, the town."

313. Yeah, because drinking beer and handling fire is always a good mix.

314. This was way back in the day when you could go up to the gate instead of waiting by baggage claim.

315. So being generous automatically makes you a woman?

316. CRUNCH BERRIES! YES!

317. He's blind and his other senses are heightened...So Joey becomes Daredevil?

318. "That is the ugliest effing skirt I've ever seen".

319. Ugh, white suit yuppie. I can't even

320. STUPID ROSS! YOU MADE ME SCREAM AT THE TV!

321. nstead of a season 2 tease, i get more bad dancing!?!?!

Moment: STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID Ross!!STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS !! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!! STUPID ROSS!!

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