How 90's Teen Shows Taught Me About Life And Love... And Still Kept Me Innocent

I'm wasn't a girl, Not yet a woman. All I needed was time, A show that was mine, While I was in between.

1989 "Saved By the Bell"

Those crazy nut-bags were just a bunch of silly-faces. I watched them navigate through life with a tan and ripped the neck of every sweater I owned to expose my bony shoulder. And that Zach Morris… well… he loved a duck named Becky and that was enough.

1990 “Beverly Hills, 90210”

To discover who they really were, they had to turn to each other.

I learned about the dangers of pumpkin farmers named Ray; about how you should always discuss your wardrobe with your friends before a dance; about how having dirty hands doesn’t equate a dirty heart; and that you should hold on to your virginity to snag a dreamboat like David Silver.

It was a while before I could trust another teen show with my heart, but then came 1998…

1998 "Dawson's Creek"

Follow your dreams. Be a good person. Ride a ferris wheel. Give second chances. Love your best friend because he’ll come around eventually. Just wait and maybe sing... even though you probably shouldn’t. There’s no way he would like you after hearing your voic-- what? Oh… okay, well good. That’s what I was going for. Wait... Pacey died his hair?

1998 "Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 2"

She loves him, but she HAS to kill him! When they had sex he turned evil! He killed Jenny Calendar! (Although, Giles with a love interest…? No.) But I mean… Angel. He broods. He’s a tai chi master. He wears sexy leather jackets... when he's wearing a jacket. Sometimes he doesn't wear shirts... and I mean... she's come this far. Life is hard for Buffy! She NEEDS this... NO! Stop it! I need another virgin!

1998 "Felicity"

Oh, thank God! Felicity. She’s so real. This is exactly what my life will be like! She's smart and knows no boundaries. She’s just a crazy nut-bag that…

Wait… Hold up. Spike wasn't just a guest star?

Oh dear Jesus… he looks like Justin Timberlake.

What am I supposed to do with this!?!?

I can't... I just can't...

I need to take a step back. I just need to go back to basics a little bit here and get myself in order---

WHAT THE FUCK?!

BUT… DAWSON?! She just... doesn’t anymore?! After years and years and years of… I mean.... Pacey's face is in there real deep, isn't it?

And he bought her a wall.

Something is happening to me...

I just need to figure this out.

DONNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT HAPPENED?????????

You got him! I mean, I always knew you would, but you’re married, right? You guys got married and THEN you lived happily ever after?! RIGHT?!?!

At least I know now. I'll always be able to trust my friends on "Saved by the Bell" to keep me innocent.

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