I know many of you are reluctant to face this cold, hard fact, but when you're in public, at least one person is likely judging you.
another day of being perceived.....
When you're at a restaurant, that person is probably — actually, MOST DEFINITELY — your waiter. This Reddit thread by u/TreeFungus has highlighted some of the most common judgments that are made. Here's what your waiter is probably judging you for:
1. "When you make up off-menu shit and just expect us to accommodate you. A lot of the time we can, but I judge you hard."
2. "If you come into a restaurant within 30 minutes before closing and sit down, I hate you."
3. "You could change every detail of your meal in some weird and obscure way, and if you're polite and understanding of the situation, I don't mind. If you command me to do something, however, I sometimes say we can't do that, even if I know fully well we can."
4. "I get judgy about parents coming to eat at the family restaurant where I work and getting sloppy drunk in front of their kids at 6:30 on a Tuesday night. I don’t care if you have a DD, your kids shouldn’t have to deal with that."
5. "I only judge those who say, 'And could you hurry? I’m in a rush.' As if these other people who have been waiting long before you even came through the door should just be skipped over 'cause you’re soooooo busy."
6. "Eight starters and main courses with veggie and vegan options, and there's NOTHING on the menu you're prepared to try? REALLY?"
7. "When they say they have an allergy and I tell them that the food they want to order has items that would trigger their allergy, and they reply, 'But that's fine, I can have it.' There are special procedures we have to do for allergies that make the food take longer."
8. "My personal favorite, 'What do you guys got?' I get this at least once a day. The menus are right in front of you, buddy, get off the phone."
9. "Whenever people order something and I bring it to them, and they say, 'That’s not what I ordered,' when it really is what they ordered."
10. "People who whine or complain to me about something like the price or an item we're out of or no longer carry. I have literally no control over stuff like that."
11. "I judge them when they make me run through the list of 15 draft beers and 20 more bottled ones (even though the drink menu is in front of them), and then they finally settle on fucking Bud Light. Screw you and your crappy taste in beers."
12. "When I was a waiter, I never really judged people based on orders, except well-done or intentionally burned food. It made it take forever, and the assholes never learned that the time was because they ordered their food ruined, not because I or anyone else was bad at our jobs."
13. "Parents who let their kids sit on a phone or tablet during the whole meal. That's a horrible lesson to the kid, that they don't have to focus on the moment or be respectful to the server, especially while ordering."
14. "I have very little patience for people acting pretentious, arrogant, or rude. If you're acting as if you know the food and wine I'm serving better than I do, or if you look down on me, I will judge the fuck out of you."
15. "You know it's gonna be a long night when the first thing they ask is, 'What do you have that's free?'"
16. "People who ask if they can buy items from the restaurant that are not food from the menu. I used to work at a restaurant and people would say, 'Can you go ask your boss/chef if I can purchase a jar of your pickles?' or 'Can I buy some of these plates from you?' No, goddamnit. This isn't a grocery store."
17. "People who ask a million questions about the food. I don't mind a few, but when you quiz me about every item on the menu, it gets ridiculous."
18. "High schoolers. They tip like shit and require the most refills I've ever seen. Seeing a table of eight-plus high schoolers headed to my section is my least favorite thing in the entire world."
19. And finally: "If you try to change your baby on the seat of your booth, you are a fucking idiot. Shit and food don't mix, lady."
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.