DISNEY'S DOGS, RANKED

Cause not all dogs are created equal.

16. GOOFY

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ZERO STARS; NOT A REAL DOG; TERRIFYING.

15. PLUTO

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Pluto is slightly more of a real dog than Goofy, but that is the only good thing about him. Owner is a mouse.

14. PERCY (POCAHONTAS)

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Lil shit. Kinda cute, but still a lil shit.

13. DODGER (OLIVER AND COMPANY)

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He looks jaunty, but that's about all we remember.

12. THE 101 DALMATION PUPPIES

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Oh my god, you are cute, yes, but could you cause any more trouble???

11. LADY (LADY AND THE TRAMP)

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Eh. She fell for Tramp, which gives her points, but definitely too prissy at first.

10. BUDDY (AIRBUD)

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Buddy is a part of a franchise which makes him rich. That is pretty impressive, for a dog.

9. BRUNO (CINDERELLA)

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Bruno is a very good boy. Kinda stupid? Such a good boy, though.

8. MAX (THE LITTLE MERMAID)

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This is Prince Eric's dog from The Little Mermaid which gets us that much closer to Prince Eric, so he is okay by us.

7. PONGO (101 DALMATIONS)

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Risks it all for love. Great dad.

6. PERDITA (101 DALMATIONS)

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Look at that sass. And a good mom to boot.

5. NANA (PETER PAN)

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Mr. Darling can SUCK IT. Poor Nana! Has to be a dog AND a governess.

4. TRAMP (LADY AND THE TRAMP)

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Is it weird to be attracted to a cartoon dog? It is? Okay, then we definitely aren't.

3. CHANCE AND BEN (HOMEWARD BOUND)

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Proving once again that dogs are the best creatures, they go through everything to get back to their humans. And they put up with the cat, too.

2. DUG (UP)

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BRB, Crying.

1. OLD YELLER.

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No one is allowed to talk to us for like 3 days, okay?