The 10 Scariest Episodes Of "Are You Afraid Of The Dark"

Children don't need sleep, right?

10. "The Tale of The Dollmaker"

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What is it about the uncanny that just sticks with us for so long? Porcelain dolls are THE WORST. They're just sitting there, waiting for you to finally fall asleep so they can complete their evil missions.

So, what could be more terrifying than trying to sleep in a room full of porcelain dolls? TURNING INTO ONE. Or, you know, trying to sleep in a room full of porcelain dolls after watching this episode.

Big Bad: Technically, the dollhouse.

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But it was Susan, half girl and half doll, who had you asking your mom to "store" your doll collection in the basement.

9. "The Tale of Many Faces"

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Emma wants to be a model and Madame Visage thinks she has the most beautiful face—BEAUTIFUL ENOUGH TO STEAL. Oh gosh, between the self esteem issues and the terrifying faceless servants, this episode was enough to make any girl swear off ever wanting to pursue a career in modeling.

AND THE FACELESS FACES: WHAT. THE. CRAP. Smooth, no nostrils, unseeing eyes. It's like someone smoothed Silly Putty over all their features. But, like, in a horrible, worst way possible scenario—not a funny, let's-imprint-my-face-into-this-Silly-Putty scenario.

Big Bad: Madame Visage

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Did George R. R. Martin see this episode? Because Madame Visage would have done well with the Faceless Men.

Valar Morghulis.

8. "The Tale of The Midnight Madness"

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You know when you were in a movie theater as a kid, watching a scary movie, and you'd squeeze your eyes shut and repeat to yourself, "It's just a movie... It's not real... It's just a movie?"

WELL, NOPE. This episode wanted to steal that little piece of comfort from you. These terrible movie villains crawled RIGHT OUT OF THE SCREEN and into our nightmares.

Big Bad: Nosferatu

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Live and in person, IIIIT'S NOSFERATU! For a lifetime engagement only, making his way into the nightmares of 90s children everywhere!

7. "The Tale Of The Whispering Walls"

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OMG these kids should definitely know better when they find a creepy, vintage, abandoned party complete with an eerie carousel music box. NEVER trust a house where old school toys make music of their own accord.

Really, Victorian mansions generally turn out to be haunted by ghosts looking to steal your soul. Just stay away.

Big Bad: Master Raymond

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Talking to a ghost without realizing it's a ghost until later—major chills.

6. "The Tale of The Lonely Ghost"

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Little ghost children are, like, 10X creepier than any other ghosts. And if they appear in mirrors behind you, well, you don't really need to ever look in a mirror again, do you?

Big Bad: Little Girl Ghost (sort of)

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While intensely creepy (living in mirrors and writing HELP ME on the walls and stuff) the little ghost girl wasn't actually trying to hurt anyone.

If there's a real antagonist in this episode, it's the bully older cousin Beth.

5. "The Tale of The Dark Music"

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Basements: Where horrors reside.

This episode was fully responsible for confirming our fears that something was waiting to literally EAT US in the basement. So, this is why some of us still shove the clothes in the dryer and run back up the stairs. Don't judge.

Big Bad: Basement Monster.

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Who animated the most TERRIFYING doll known to man: A doll who floats along eerily and invites you to play. WHO DID THIS.

Say no.

4. "The Tale Of Laughing In The Dark"

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What's creepier than a clown seeking vengeance? Nothing. NOTHING IS WORSE than a nightmarish, cigar-smoking clown out to get you. SO DON'T STEAL ITS NOSE!!!

Also, you probably should just never enter funhouses called "Laughing in the Dark" because that's obviously ominous.

Big bad: Zeebo

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Just in case you ever wanted to enjoy the circus again.

Sorry.

3. "The Tale of The Crimson Clown"

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I watched this episode with older cousins and thoroughly regretted it every night thereafter.

WHY THE CLOWNS?

Flip your brother over in his bed. CLOWN. Open the closet door. CLOWN. Try to escape. CLOWN. You get the idea.

Big Bad: Crimson Clown

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Cue maniacal laughter. And nightmares.

2. "The Tale of The Ghastly Grinner"

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It's not coincidence that clown episodes are rounding out the top 4. Are You Afraid Of The Dark really did have a monopoly on scary clowns. With that said, WHY ARE THERE SO MANY FREAKING CLOWNS?

With his yellow face and matching teeth, the Ghastly Grinner was a child's nightmare-made flesh. And he came out of a COMIC BOOK. Basically it's like: "Children, all your nightmare characters can walk right out of their fictional worlds to terrorize you. Reading is FUN!"

Big Bad: Ghastly Grinner

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Goodnight, kids.

1. And finally and frighteningly, "The Tale of The Dead Man's Float"

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And THE SCARIEST episode of Are You Afraid Of The Dark goes to: The Tale Of The Dead Man's Float.

This episode was single-handedly responsible for an entire generation's irrational fear of public swimming pools. Because if that swimming pool just so happens to be built on a graveyard, there's probably a FREAKING ZOMBIE just waiting to float up and eat you.

So, you know...watch out.

Big Bad: Water Zombie

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This thing is definitely NOT PG. It's all blood and gore and the stuff that complexes are made of.

Sweet dreams, Canada!