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    Posted on Apr 14, 2018

    17 Lazy Girl Jokes That Will Make You Laugh — If You Have The Energy To Look, Anyway

    "I have plenty groceries in this house, it would be lazy as hell to order dinner." *opens Grubhub*

    1. When cleaning the house is, like, your last priority:

    On HGTV they can flip a house in a month and I've been "getting ready to dust" for the past two weeks.

    2. As well as posture:

    3. When you're just a truly honest shopper:

    *shopping for pants @lululemon * sales associate: “what kind of activities do you plan on doing?” Me: “googling celebrity workout plans and drinking an entire bottle of wine” Sales associate: “right this way.”

    4. When you'd like to be lazy even when you're in pain:

    There should be a special belt that holds your hot water bottle to your tummy so u can walk around freely just thinking aloud here investors

    5. When you have the best of intentions to cook, but THIS happens instead:

    i have plenty groceries in this house... it would be lazy as hell to order dinner. *opens grubhub*

    6. When you're prepared, just in case:

    I carboload every night in case I wanna run a marathon the next day. I never do, but it’s always good to have options

    7. When you realize you could maybe be drinking more water:

    Do I Have A Headache Because My Ponytail Is Too Tight Or Am I Just Dehydrated, a short story

    8. When this thought crosses your mind (every, damn, day):

    Every single morning I consider dropping out of society and living in my bed full time.

    9. When you still can't be bothered:

    Me: *reads all the self-help books* Also Me: *never helps myself*

    10. When you wonder if you're lazy even in your sleep:

    What if I'm a sleepwalker, except I'm so lazy that even when I sleepwalk I just lie in bed. #ThingsIThinkAboutWhenImNotWorking #HelpMe

    11. When you honestly just can't remember things sometimes:

    "Did I put deodorant on?" - Me six times a day

    12. When everyday things are just so overwhelming:

    Can you die from having too many passwords to remember

    13. When you're too lazy to deal with stress:

    RELATIVE: You know about computers, right? ME (has a degree in computer science): No

    14. When you FINALLY get around to doing that one thing you meant to do years ago:

    Just finished an article link I bookmarked in 2005, and uh yeah, I have some questions

    15. When technology doesn't jell well with your laziness:

    Autocorrect on my phone has made me so lazy. I type “hrkkp” and get pissed off that it doesn’t get changed to “hello”

    16. When you're happy to just wait something out instead:

    I am so lazy I thought about looking at the super moon and decided 2033 isn't even that far away

    17. And finally, when leaving your bed just isn't an option:

    When ur too lazy to get up from bed and turn off the lights

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