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Why Getting "Fifed" By CTV Reporter Robert Fife Is The Worst Thing That Can Happen To You

Fife gotta Fife.

CTV News Ottawa bureau chief Robert "Bob" Fife breaks news like you breakfast — every damn day.

CTV News
CTV News

Fife broke the news that Senator Mike Duffy received a cheque for $90,000 from Nigel Wright to cover questionable residency expenses he had claimed. Wright was at the time the chief of staff for Prime Minister Stephen Harper.

The ongoing Duffy trial for fraud and other charges has raised more questions about that payment. Specifically who in the Prime Minister's Office knew that Wright was paying the money?

Chris Wattie / Reuters

One big question is whether Harper's current chief of staff, Ray Novak, knew about the cheque. Novak and the prime minister have always said he didn't.

But the court heard testimony that Novak was in the room when the payment was discussed. Evidence also shows he received an email from Wright that detailed the payment.

Novak has not testified or commented publicly on the new information.

Solution: he gots to get Fifed.

BuzzFeed Canada

Novak was out walking Friday morning when all of a sudden Bob Fife ran up on him and started blasting questions all pew pew pew pew pew.

CTV News / Via ctvnews.ca

This is the face of a man who knows he's getting Fifed but can't do anything about it.

CTV News / Via ctvnews.ca

Canadian politicos live in fear of getting Fifed.

If I was Ray Novak and I saw @RobertFife and a cameraman coming I would have just dropped to the ground and played dead. #elxn42

He has a reputation for relentless Fifing.

@_scottreid Although thinking about it, I'm pretty @RobertFife would just keep poking at your fauxcorpse until you gave up.

A representation of how Bob Fife would Fife someone who tried to avoid the Fifing by playing dead.

@_scottreid @kady @RobertFife I imagine it something like this

Conclusion: that fauxcorpose got FIFED.

Former PMO staffer Andrew MacDougall was Fifed many times when he was in the job, and he is still traumatized by the experience.


"Nigel Wright could have emailed me the cure for cancer after I got evening-Fifed and I probably wouldn’t have noticed," MacDougall wrote in Maclean's.

Smiling Bob Fife was born to Fife.

CTV News / Via ctvnews.ca

Walking and Fifing.

Earlier this week, he Fifed another figure in the Duffy trial. Here's former PMO staffer Chris Woodcock arriving in court to testify. He seems pretty confident.

CTV News

Woodcock came out of the courthouse after testifying and that's when HE GOT FIFED.

CTV News / Via ctvnews.ca

"Why did you think there's nothing ethically wrong with lying to Canadians?" Fife asked him.

Surprise, Chris Woodcock! Now it's Fife by your side.

CTV News / Via ctvnews.ca

Don't show any expression, Chris. Fife feeds on fear.

CTv News / Via ctvnews.ca

Woodcock thought he had Fife beat by making a quick cut. But Fife spun around and shoved a second mic in his face with the other hand.

CTV News

That's a Double Mic Spin Fifing, and at least seven other journalists have blown out their knees trying to execute it.

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  1. Who needs to get Fifed next?

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Who needs to get Fifed next?
    vote votes
    Stephen Harper, about when he found out that Nigel Wright was cutting a cheque for Mike Duffy.
    vote votes
    Drake, about whether he and Serena Williams are dating.
    vote votes
    Kory Teneycke, about why the press can't have unlimited questions at Harper campaign events.

Craig Silverman is a media editor for BuzzFeed News and is based in Toronto.

Contact Craig Silverman at craig.silverman@buzzfeed.com.

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