This "life-transforming breathspray" promises to make you look and feel Canadian. It sells for $6.82 on Amazon.com but costs $10.89 on Amazon.ca because our dollar is in the toilet.
"Succumb to the fantasy!"
The back of the packaging says you'll "instantly experience an enhanced appreciation of fresh water lakes, rippling streams, moose, squirrels, bears, maple syrup, and loons. .... And, best of all, look and feel Canadian!"
Actually, the best part may be the reviews on Amazon. People are posting pretty much every awful Canadian stereotype ever as a testament to the effectiveness of the spray.
"I got strange cravings for maple syrup, and free health care."
"Whenever I use it I get an urge to play hockey and hang out at a Tim Horton's and I don't even know what a Tim Horton's is."
"There's nothing better for covering Molson breath."
"I feel as if my blood has been changed to maple syrup."
"I ordered this and used it, now I am too polite to write anything negative."
This woman may have overdosed on the breathspray because she concocted an entire fantasy involving leprechauns and "hot lumberjacks."
This guy took one spray and "made my way to the nearest Tim Horton's, where I sincerely apologized for my impromptu arrival, and expediently ordered some Timbits."
"If only Canada was a real place and not just some fantasy make believe land that exists in only in my wildest dreams."