6 Annoying Aspects Of Scary Movies

Just think of how many lovely actresses we've lost to idiocy.

1. Why does no one ever turn on the lights?

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I mean, of course, when I walk into a huge house where I know a killer might be, the first thought I have is "Oh, I better keep the lights off! Don't want to scare the potential killer away. That'd be rude!" You must be kidding me. I'd turn on every single light on the block, and then have a helicopter shine their SWAT team high beam or whatever it is, directly on the house.

2. Who explores by themselves?

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So when me and my friends are exploring some corn field or some abandoned warehouse for a killer, we don't immediately think, "Oh! We should split up! And each of us should walk by ourselves. And none of us should carry a flashlight. Or a weapon." Hell no.

3. Who stays on a phone call with the "killer"?

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If someone called me, breathing all heavy with some T-Pain voice, I'd immediately hang up. Well not immediately, first I'd ask if it was T-Pain, and guessing it's not, I'd then hang up.

4. Who actually abides by the "come alone" request?

Honestly. You know when when this happens in the movie, that actor is about to be offed. And I especially hate when that's the last thing the killer says, then they hang up. First off, RUDE. Do not hang up on me until we have exchanged formal "talk to you later's" or "goodbyes." I mean, I get it, you want me to come alone. But at least give me a chance to say "Okay, see you soon!" before you hang up. Didn't your mother teach you any manners?

5. Why does everyone run upstairs?

Okay, take note of what I'm about to say, in case a killer is ever chasing you. I don't know if you know this or not, but running upstairs doesn't lead you to some sort of alternate universe or black hole where you suddenly appear outside. Crazy, I know. Also, unless you're Eric Clapton, your house doesn't have a stairway to heaven.

6. Then, why does everyone hide under the bed?

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I know, under the bed is just the most AMAZING hiding spot. Being that it's surrounded on all sides by concrete walls and a complex locking system. OH WAIT. That's a panic room. Where I actually would run, thanks for the tip Jodie Foster. Actually, when I think of that movie "Panic Room" all I remember is that Kristen Stewart was in it as a young boy. It's nice to see she's matured into a nice young lady.

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