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People Are Revealing The Disturbing Discoveries From Their Partner's Home That Made Them Want To Call It Quits

"I was speechless and didn't know how to react. We are no longer together."

Your partner's home can say a lot about them. Maybe they're a clean minimalist, maybe they like to keep things super cozy, or perhaps they're simply a walking red flag. Well, recently, I asked the BuzzFeed Community to share the major WTF moment they had when seeing their significant other's home for the first time that made them want to leave immediately. Here are the shocking moments they shared.

1. "I visited my now-husband's family with him on Christmas after we just started dating. They knew we were coming as his mom picked us up. His dad was sitting in front of the TV in underwear. He gave me a hug when greeting me. Then he went back to watching darts in his very little grayish boxers. He didn't talk to me until saying goodbye. Weird stuff."


2. "I went to his place, which he shared with his cousin who worked at a hospital. We were just talking, and I happened to notice a small jar with liquid and a severed thumb in it just sitting on the display case with other knick knacks. I couldn't get out of there fast enough."

A severed thumb submerged in a jar of liquid with miscellaneous items in the background

3. "I walked in with plans to spend the night, and it was honestly the most depressing thing I've seen. Roommate's dirty kid running around in nothing but a dirty diaper with smelly dogs that pee out of excitement. The couch was ripped up, stuffing coming out. He explained that his roommate had just gotten divorced. The roommate came in and took care of the baby. I went downstairs to his half of the house, and it was clean, so I stayed the night but didn't sleep with him. I was questioning dating someone who didn't see anything wrong with the upstairs."

"The next morning, he went to work, and I went into his private bathroom to shower. We live in an arid climate, and this standup shower was fluorescent green from top to bottom. I mean it when I say covered. I've never seen anything like it. 

There was a small round area on the bottom where the water hit the ground. I sponge-bathed instead, and the towel smelled like mildew, so I rolled on his bed to dry off. I left and told him exactly why."


4. "My boyfriend, whom I met while on vacation in another country (but we both happened to live in the same area), was going through the process of divorce. His ex went off the rails partying in his absence, so he got possession of his big, beautiful house. I was excited to see it and be there, but when he got the keys and entered for the first time in months, I was greeted with several 'self-portrait' type paintings of his ex-wife's boobs. She had also been painted the garage with imprints of her boobs and ass."

a portrait of Joan Callamezzo in Parks and Rec in a flowy dress posing seductively on a chaise lounge

5. "When my now husband and I were dating in college, he lived in a house with a few other guys. He had an unfinished basement room with literal nails sticking out of the concrete walls. The only piece of furniture was a bare mattress on the ground, and all of his clothes were in a massive pile next to an unopened Ikea dresser kit. There were a lot of big, venomous spiders that lived in the area around our college, so there was a fairy ring of glue traps around the mattress to catch the spiders, and quite a few massive ones were on display this way. It was like walking into a horror movie!"

"Thankfully, he's learned about the joys of furniture, bedding, and finished walls/fun decor. Now, our house is fully furnished and covered in fun knickknacks, paintings, and memorabilia. Also, thankfully, we no longer live in a place with massive venomous spiders."


6. "I used to date someone who lived in New York City. I noticed that he had a habit of reusing toilet paper. One night, I went to his place and used the bathroom. But, to my surprise, there wasn't any toilet paper. When I called out to him, he suggested I use the toilet paper from the garbage can. However, it was used toilet paper, and considering he's a guy, he's only wiping one thing. I was speechless and didn't know how to react. We are no longer together."

An overflowing bathroom trash can beside a toilet, with paper waste on the floor and a sink nearby

7. "I went on a few dates with a former NFL player. On the third date, we met at his place, and I discovered it was a wall-to-wall shrine dedicated to his glory days, which ended maybe five to six years before. Framed jerseys, framed clippings, photo albums — it was way over the top. I get that it was a huge accomplishment and a huge part of his life, but I just got the sense (based on things he said as well) that he felt like his best days were behind him, and that's not something I want in a partner."


8. "He had mentioned that he was interested in true crime stuff. I didn't find it strange, given that's an interest for a lot of people, but when I went to his apartment, he had letters from MULTIPLE serial killers that he had been writing back and forth with. Some dated back years. That goes far beyond 'interest,' as far as I'm concerned. We dated a couple more months after that, and it never came up again."

A person's hand holding a bundle of tied old letters

9. "The large number of tiny teddy bears in the home of a 64-year-old single man. Plus photos of the ex for extra discomfort."


10. "I was invited over for dinner. The apartment was visibly dirty. Not messy, dirty! I was in the bathroom, and being nosy, I peered behind the closed shower curtain. There were dirty dishes stacked in the tub! I also asked later if I could get a drink. I went to the fridge, where he said there were sodas, and I saw the milk jug had a February expiration date. It was June at the time. I got the hell out of there shortly after."

A gallon of expired whole milk on a kitchen counter with various groceries in the background

11. "I started dating this guy in my early 20s, and he had recently moved back to our town and was staying with his family. He took me to their house for the first time, and the whole family was gathered in a dark living room watching TV. By whole family, I mean about six people ranging from small children to mid-50s. I looked at the TV to see what they were watching, and it was a porn film. Hardcore porn."

—Anonymous, 58, Indiana

12. "This was when I was in my early 20s, and the guy I was dating lived with his parents and sister. They all shared the same towel for showering and expected me to share, too! Ew."

Beige towel hanging on a rack with decorative white stripes at the bottom

13. "He had photos of himself all over the place. Turned out to be an actual narcissist."


14. "It seems so obvious now. The first time I went to my ex's place was four months into dating. His apartment had stuff but was stark, sterile, and unlived. There was a nondescript couch, coffee table, and lamp. He had no books, even though he taught English. There were no photos either. In the bedroom, there was a bed and his work clothes in the closet — nothing else. The bed was pristine and crisply made. Four dishes in the cupboard, coffee, two mugs, and silverware. Everything was absolutely spotless..."

A clean and modern living room with a large sofa and a coffee table

15. "I'm a half-Black, half-white American woman and was living in South Africa. I visited my now-ex and his family at their home. They employed a Black Xhosa maid like many middle- and upper-class families in the Eastern Cape. But I was horrified to see the shed they housed her in in the back with a separate, cramped toilet space to use despite having a nice, unused grandmother suite in the house. That, plus all the racial comments they made in front of her and me, was one of the contributing factors to us not making it."


16. "The first time I went to my girlfriend's (now my wife of 36 years) house and met her mother, everything seemed fine. The yard and the house were clean and beautifully kept. The fun started after we finished eating dinner. Her mom got up, went to a filing cabinet in a corner of the kitchen, and brought a folder to the table. She took out a couple of documents and proudly stated that she had just bought 40 acres on Mars. She asked me if I would be interested in buying Martian property. I looked at my wife, and the look of complete horror on her face was priceless. Then her sister busted out laughing uncontrollably, which drove me over the edge, and I couldn't stop laughing. To this day, my wife gets upset whenever I bring this up."

Family of six enjoying a meal together at a dining table

17. "I was at my boyfriend's place for the first time, staying for a few days. He had gone into the bedroom to change. His mother (whom I had never met) walked in the front door, said hi, and asked where Joey was. I pointed toward the bedroom. She walked right over there and tried to open the door, which he had locked when he heard her. So she said to me, 'Joey owes me $100. Could you just give that to me and get it back from him?' WTF! I just told her I didn't have it. Joey was so embarrassed."


18. "I had hung out with this guy I met through my friends a couple of times when he invited me to his place to hang around before going out near his area. Before we were about to leave I excused myself to the restroom. I had just finished peeing and noticed there was no toilet paper left. I glanced around and couldn’t see any, so I kind of sucked it up, and I didn’t want to snoop too much to look for more."

An empty toilet paper holder mounted on a wall

19. "I learned that his family is VERY open about sex. His mom asked me what type of vibrator I used during dinner."


20. "So when I first started dating my current boyfriend, he had a roommate with whom he's still friends. The roommate had a cat. He did not own a litter scoop and would literally just take the cat box outside to the wooded area and dump it like once every other month. His eating habits were also weird; he'd get take-out and leave a single carrot, then put the take-out container in the fridge like he was really going to go back and eat that single carrot. And they would NEVER throw things away. That single carrot in the take-out box would be there until there was no more room in the fridge. Then my boyfriend's gross thing is that he washed his sheets maybe once every four months before I came along."

An overturned cat litter box with litter spilled on the floor

21. "After months of texting, I finally agreed to take the train to visit him where he lived. He bragged all day about cleaning his apartment for me to come over, only for there to be a bunch of trash under his bed, dirty dishes all over, and a hole in the wall in the kitchen. Like, okay, Kyle."


Did you ever have a major WTF moment when visiting a partner for the first time? Let us know in the comments, or fill out this anonymous form!