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35 Things Australians Are Doing Completely And Utterly Wrong

Sit down, Australia. We need to talk.

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1. Keeping Vegemite in the fridge.

Why it's wrong: Because cold Vegemite doesn’t spread properly.
BuzzFeed

Why it's wrong: Because cold Vegemite doesn’t spread properly.

2. Wearing socks with thongs.

Why it's wrong: It's lazy AF. Either take your socks off or put shoes on.
BuzzFeed

Why it's wrong: It's lazy AF. Either take your socks off or put shoes on.

3. Eating dry Weet-Bix.

Why it's wrong: Because it's a Weet-Bix, not a Sao.
Via sanitarium.com.au

Why it's wrong: Because it's a Weet-Bix, not a Sao.

4. Giving Celebrations as a gift rather than Favourites.

Why it's wrong: All you're giving is the sad realisation of what might have been.
woolworths.com.au

Why it's wrong: All you're giving is the sad realisation of what might have been.

5. Playing "Don't Call Me Baby" at house parties.

Why it's wrong: Oh please. The same goes for "Murder on the Dance Floor".
EMI International / Via cdandlp.com

Why it's wrong: Oh please. The same goes for "Murder on the Dance Floor".

6. Buying fruit-free hot cross buns at Easter.

Why it's wrong: Without the fruit it's just a bloody bread roll.
Via Instagram: @reevac

Why it's wrong: Without the fruit it's just a bloody bread roll.

7. Falling off this chair.

Why it's wrong: It's an $8 Bunnings chair. What did you expect?
Via bunnings.com.au / nichaelforyou.tumblr.com

Why it's wrong: It's an $8 Bunnings chair. What did you expect?

8. Ordering food on Jetstar.

Why it's wrong: You'll be at Tullamarine in an hour. You can survive without a frickin' Sumo Salad.
Via jetstar.com

Why it's wrong: You'll be at Tullamarine in an hour. You can survive without a frickin' Sumo Salad.

9. Voting for shit TV at the Logies.

Why it's wrong: Because Home and Away has won 45 Logies and Cheez TV never got a goddamn one.
Via Seven Network

Why it's wrong: Because Home and Away has won 45 Logies and Cheez TV never got a goddamn one.

10. Making fun of New Zealanders by saying "fush and chups".

Instagram: @itslovejess

Why it's wrong: A much better way to piss off NZ is to claim we invented all their cultural icons.

11. Putting tinned beetroot in salad sangers.

Instagram: @elaineloveshealthy

Why it's wrong: Its sickly sweet flavour overpowers everything in a 1 kilometre radius.

12. Keeping your Esky in the sun.

Why it's wrong: By late afternoon your beer will be warm. (The other rookie's mistake is tipping out the water when the ice melts.)
Via instagram.com

Why it's wrong: By late afternoon your beer will be warm. (The other rookie's mistake is tipping out the water when the ice melts.)

13. Being a timewaster on Gumtree.

Why it's wrong: Not showing up to collect something is a dick move. Also, stop making dumb enquiries and asking for free shit.
BuzzFeed

Why it's wrong: Not showing up to collect something is a dick move. Also, stop making dumb enquiries and asking for free shit.

14. Drinking Pasito rather than Passiona.

Instagram: @moushmiene

Why it's wrong: Passiona is objectively better.

15. Eating Samboy chips rather than Smiths.

Instagram: @bruce_mate

Why it's wrong: Smiths are objectively better.

16. Eating Crunchies rather than Violet Crumbles.

Why it's wrong: Violet Crumbles are objectively better.
EvanAmos / Via en.wikipedia.org

Why it's wrong: Violet Crumbles are objectively better.

17. Skimping on sunscreen.

Why it's wrong: The Cancer Council says most of us don't use enough sunscreen to get adequate protection. You need to put on "at least a teaspoon for each limb, front and back of the body and half a teaspoon for the face, neck and ears".
Peter Dutton / Via Flickr: joeshlabotnik / creativecommons.org

Why it's wrong: The Cancer Council says most of us don't use enough sunscreen to get adequate protection. You need to put on "at least a teaspoon for each limb, front and back of the body and half a teaspoon for the face, neck and ears".

18. Sharing fake Qantas giveaways on Facebook.

Why it's wrong: If it looks too good to be true, it usually is.
Adrian Pingstone / Via commons.wikimedia.org

Why it's wrong: If it looks too good to be true, it usually is.

19. Correcting people who say "youse".

Why it's wrong: "Youse" is a great Australian word that fills a need for a second-person plural in English.
Travis Hornung (cropped) / creativecommons.org / Via Flickr: awfulshot

Why it's wrong: "Youse" is a great Australian word that fills a need for a second-person plural in English.

20. Playing Goon of Fortune with only one goon bag.

Why it's wrong: The standard rules for Goon of Fortune require four goon bags hung on each corner of the Hills Hoist, three cold and one warm.
matt_777 / Via reddit.com

Why it's wrong: The standard rules for Goon of Fortune require four goon bags hung on each corner of the Hills Hoist, three cold and one warm.

21. Dacking your mates so hard you pull down their undies too.

Instagram: @joeagius

Why it's wrong: "Double-dacking" is against the International Dacking Code of Conduct.

22. Putting shitloads of tomato sauce on your chips.

Why it's wrong: It's incredibly rude to whoever is sharing your chips. Sauce on the side plz.
instagram.com

Why it's wrong: It's incredibly rude to whoever is sharing your chips. Sauce on the side plz.

23. Throwing out your old jaffle maker to buy a sandwich press.

Why it's wrong: Because a tinned spaghetti jaffle beats a fancy-arse panini any day of the week.
harveynorman.com.au

Why it's wrong: Because a tinned spaghetti jaffle beats a fancy-arse panini any day of the week.

24. Asking for BBQ sauce at the kebab shop.

Why it's wrong: The only legitimate sauces are garlic, chilli, or garlic and chilli.
George J. / Via yelp.com.au

Why it's wrong: The only legitimate sauces are garlic, chilli, or garlic and chilli.

25. Making any of the craft projects from Better Homes and Gardens.

Why it's wrong: WTF are you doing with your life.
Via Seven Network

Why it's wrong: WTF are you doing with your life.

26. Hating on instant coffee.

Why it's wrong: Don't be that guy.
Instagram: @pipaando

Why it's wrong: Don't be that guy.

27. Calling Uluru "Ayers Rock".

Why it's wrong: Because it's 2016.
Thomas Schoch / Via en.wiktionary.org / CC BY-SA 3.0

Why it's wrong: Because it's 2016.

28. Not using your indicator.

Why it's wrong: Because someone in a ute will inevitably shout out, "Nice blinker, fuckwit!".

Why it's wrong: Because someone in a ute will inevitably shout out, "Nice blinker, fuckwit!".

29. Driving either a Holden Barina or a Mazda 121.

Why it's wrong: Because the 90s is over.
Via en.wikipedia.org

Why it's wrong: Because the 90s is over.

30. Texting in the car.

Why it's wrong: Because your emoji addiction could literally kill somebody. 🙅
Steven Damron (cropped) / creativecommons.org / Via Flickr: sadsnaps

Why it's wrong: Because your emoji addiction could literally kill somebody. 🙅

31. Putting the wrong sprinkles on fairy bread.

Why it's wrong: This one's officially un-Australian.
Gemsling / Via en.wikipedia.org / Dani Lurie (cropped) / Flickr: slushpup

Why it's wrong: This one's officially un-Australian.

32. Making bongs that look like this.

Why it's wrong: Because you're not in Year 9 any more.
Via reddit.com

Why it's wrong: Because you're not in Year 9 any more.

33. Xenophobia.

Why it's wrong: Because we can do better ay.
rellumnoceros / Via reddit.com

Why it's wrong: Because we can do better ay.

34. Mowing the lawn on Saturday morning.

Instagram: @foreveraiden

Why it's wrong: It's actual torture for the people with a hangover in the sharehouse next door.

35. Not mixing Milo properly.

Instagram: @nicole131989

Why it's wrong: Because dissolving Milo with a little hot water first makes for a smoother, more satisfying beverage.