Shit You Should Never Say To A Huge Disney Fan

Ever since I was small I keep hearing the same stupid comments about Disney over and over again and I want it to end and I'm sure I'm not the only person. To help you NOT look like an idiot in front of a Disney nerd, never say the following...

20. They're such an evil monopolizing corporation blah blah blah blah money blah blah blah

19. "Alice in Wonderland is ALL about drugs!"

Yeah, we get it. We've gotten it since we knew what drugs were.

18. "I can show you a WHOLE New World"

Oh how cute you think you can win me over by trying to quote Aladdin and not even getting the sentence right...

17. "I think that Disney needs to stop with the sequels"

..... you mean the ones they stopped making in 2008?

16. "I loooooooooooooooooooooove Pocahontas!"

............okay I'm going to put it this way: Beauty and the Beast is to Pocahontas as Chocolate Chip Cookies is to Oatmeal Raisin Cookies.

15. "Is Disney really frozen?"

I'm going out on a limb here and saying no.

14. "Did you know those original stories like Snow White are really really dark?"

This is equivalent to telling someone that McDonald's isn't healthy or that it gets hot in the summer.

13. "Disney hates moms! They are like NEVER alive!"

Truly, you are only referencing 6/53 official animated canon.

Snow White

Cinderella

The Little Mermaid

Beauty and the Beast

Aladdin

Pocahontas

12. Don't you love Merida? So feminist! She doesn't need a man!

fuckoff.

11. " I heard Walt Disney hated Jewish people!"

no comment.

10. "My Favorite is Anastasia!"

........ I really hope you mean Cinderella's Stepsister.

9. "Disney is racist!"

so is your grandmother.

8. "SEX WRITTEN IN THE SKY IN LION KING!!!!!!!!!"

It actually says SFX

7. "PENIS ON LITTLE MERMAID VHS COVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

..........uh.......fine.

6. "Pixar is so much better then Disney."

I'm glad you think they're not the same thing.......

5. OMG I Neeeeed to show you this Tumblr/Buzzfeed/Video I found about Disney!

Before I stop you, 23 other people have posted it on my timeline already.

4. "Have you ever been to Disney World? I went once I didn't like it, too much Disney."

I hope a dog craps on your foot today.

3. "Ariel is a terrible role model! She sells her voice for a guy she doesn't know and a vagina!"

and yet you sing to "Part of Your World". This one actually really bugs me. but that's for another time

2. Did you see Frozen?

....... go.....away........

1. "I hope Disney doesn't fuck with Star Wars!"

.......................