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22 Things All Messy Couples Know

Kisses > Dishes.

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1. Your shared flat is a mountain range of piles.

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You occasionally hang up a jumper or two, but there's a lot of stuff between the two of you and it's honestly easier if it's all just out in the open.

3. You both hate having a pile of dishes in the sink.

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But you also hate cleaning, so you mostly just eat off disposable paperware.

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5. You've probably ended up wearing each other's clothes rather than doing the laundry.

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Whatever's on top of The Clean Pile belongs to the first person to grab it.

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10. If not, you dream of having the funds to go halfsies on a cleaner.

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You're probably as poorly organised about your money as you are with the rest of your stuff.

11. Or you've actively decided against a cleaner because you know you'll just spill Dominos dipping sauce on the floor they just mopped like two hours earlier.

13. And if company shows up unannounced, one of you distracts them at the door while the other one scrambles to "tidy" the flat.

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AKA shoving as much shit under the bed and in the closet as humanly possible.

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14. Then two months later, you finally find the headphones your partner's been looking for for AGES underneath a pile of empty crisp bags at the back of the wardrobe.

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Sometimes it's nice to rediscover things you thought were gone. Other times you have to hide whatever you find again, because you already convinced your partner they MUST have lost it themselves weeks ago, and you're certainly not going to drag that argument up again.

15. It is ALWAYS your partner's fault and not yours that things are not clean.

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They may be messy but you are messier. And lazier. And you shouldn't be punished for that, amirite?

16. Unless your partner thinks YOU'RE to blame for the pile-up of shoes you never wear by the door.

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To be fair, they're convinced that THEY are messier and lazier and should not be punished for that.

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19. The last time you vacuumed was probably back when you first started dating and were trying to impress each other by not being gross.

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That's why dating is the worst.

21. And that you could be your messy, unorganised, pile-making, key-losing, non-dusting self with them.

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Hooray for weekly dates to Primark for new underwear because that's so much better than weekly trips to Tesco for fabric softener.

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