Recently, I asked the BuzzFeed Community, "What were your parents right about when they said, 'You'll understand when you have kids of your own?'"
Here's what people said.
"When I couldn't sleep, my mom used to say, 'You don't have to sleep, just lay there and rest!' I hated it as a kid, but now I see the wisdom and say it to my own child all the time. Laying in bed in the dark 'resting' is the best way to fall asleep (and restorative on its own anyway)."
"'We have food at home.' My mom was right. I understand now, lol."
"That the things I thought were no big deal (not wanting to eat what she cooked for dinner, not wanting to do the 'fun family stuff') are a big deal to a mom. I can't tell you how many times I've spent a ridiculous amount of time cooking something new just for my kids to say, 'Can we have pizza instead?' It made me want to cry. You spend all this time and effort into something just for them not to want it, in addition to trying to feed your kids the right stuff… it can be a lot to deal with, especially when you've already got a lot going on."
"How much love you can have for someone. It's a love that is completely unexplainable until you have children. And the worry. I was never a worrier until I had children. And last but not least, how the hardest part of being a parent is letting them go and letting them spread their wings. Incredibly painful and beautiful all at the same time."
"Same. My mum always said I’d never understand until I had kids of my own how much she loved me. Now I have three boys, and I love them so much I can’t even explain. Makes me wanna explode!!"
"How much you give up to raise your child. When I found out I was pregnant at 20, I never realized just how much I had to give up to be a good mother. Now I'm 23 with an almost 2-year-old. I still have few friends and no social life at all. I cannot work, as I wouldn't even be able to afford daycare in this day's climate. I have given up my time to be a stay-at-home mom. Yet, my love for my baby is worth everything I gave up. I wouldn't change it for the world. I've realized that's what to expect when you become a mother. 🩶"
"Needing to go in the other room for a minute to collect yourself during your child's tantrum. As a kid, I thought it meant she didn't love me or care, but now I understand that it's BECAUSE she loved me and cared that she needed to take a breath before dealing with the hysterics."
"Why I'm always worried about everything all the time. When my dad worried about EVERYTHING regarding me and my siblings, I told him to please relax. He said you'll understand when you have your own kids and now I'm like, ohhhhkkkk."
"'One day you will have a kid just like you!' They said it as if I was going to get comeuppance for my bad behavior as a child. I did get a kid just like me. It turns out the 'bad behavior' is autism (I'm most likely, just never diagnosed), and because he is just like me, I can get him the help he needs to thrive, as well as be himself because I don't expect him to act neurotypical."
"A sage woman warned me of a few things that helped me raise my daughter, even after my mom passed away. (1) Of all the family relationships, the mother/daughter one is the most complex and most prone to being difficult. She explained the psychology behind it, and it made sense. It really helped me when my girl became a teen. (2) The child will usually rebel hardest against the parent they trust the most. Why? Because they know that you won't reject them or leave them. As twisted as it sounds, it makes sense. (3) Trust your intuition as a parent, even if you can't explain why you won't let your kid go to that sleepover or whatever it is. Always trust your intuition. (4) Also, don't ever dismiss your child's concerns. Usually, children tell the truth about why someone makes them feel creeped out or whatever. In the best way, they know how to express themselves to you for their age. And even if it isn't the total truth, you still need to listen."
