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1. Pregnancy tiredness is nothing compared to being screamed out of bed every hour by an angry mini-human…
2. You will spend three hours willing your baby to sleep and then accidentally wake them up ten minutes later when you check they are breathing...
3. When your baby finally nods off you will lie there unable to sleep because you miss them...
4. Then when you do fall asleep you will wake up wildly searching under pillows for your baby (who is safely in their crib).
5. Your first question to every other new parent you meet will be: ‘How is he/she sleeping?’
6. Then you will silently resent them if it is better than your baby...
7. Sometimes you will need to change your clothes as many times as your baby...
8. You will think you can hear crying when you are in the shower. But when you run to your baby in a soggy panic they will be sound asleep...
9. Your boobs will be out of control…
10. There will be random baby paraphernalia discarded all over your house...
11. You will walk around with a vacant expression after forgetting what you set out to do…
12. Your appearance is now an afterthought…
13. Every day is fueled by coffee...
14. If anyone witnessed you singing and dancing to your baby you’d be mortified…
15. You will desperately google 23,000 baby questions a day…
16. When the UPS man arrives with a parcel you will be sooo excited to interact with an adult…
17. Unless they ring the doorbell when your baby is asleep...
18. You will want to tell every parent you meet with more than one child how awesome they are...
19. And parents with twins or triplets are like superheroes to you...
20. You will say you never want to do this again until you decide you can’t wait to do it again.
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