Skip To Content
    Updated on Aug 25, 2020. Posted on Mar 12, 2014

    6 Questionable Ways We Define 'Success'

    It takes a degree of mental illness to become a super successful businessman, as it turns out.

    by , ,

    Step 1: take tests from K-12 in a terrifying world dominated by mean children while doing arbitrary assignments.

    toothpastefordinner.com

    *if you're lucky enough to go to a functioning school.

    Step 2: fork over tens of thousands of dollars for a name-brand college. Major in something lucrative or else risk never being able to pay back student loans.

    Step 3: pay your dues by doing years of underpaid labor in an expensive city.

    Step 4: spend most of your waking life working in an office (if you're lucky).

    Step 5: buy a home.

    Step 6: brag about all that at a wedding, family gathering, or reunion.

    OR YOU CAN: Move to a cheap city where you can get by on a part-time job. Live peacefully. Smooch the ones you love.

    Kevin Tang

    Either way. Tell that to your parents when they ask you why you haven't sold a start-up for $200,000,000 yet.