1. This feat of masculinity.
2. This manly meal plan.
Richard Hammond’s meal plan Breakfast: cornflakes with water Lunch: raw meat and potatoes Dinner: scrap metal washed down with antifreeze
3. This magical apparition.
4. This flashback.
Has anyone got the exact right time? My kitchen clock says 9.36, my alarm clock says 9.40 and Richard Hammond thinks it's 1953.
5. This legit photo.
Here's a photograph of Richard Hammond cruising around for gay men to service.
6. This truth.
"ice cream is gay" might be the worst opinion I've ever heard and I'm on twitter
7. This masterpiece from Australia.
Richard Hammond is so going to be turned when he tries ice cream in Australia.
8. This flash mob that honestly needs to happen.
Flash mob at Richard Hammond's house. 1000 men silently eat ice cream while staring into his window.
9. This very real danger.
10. This gesture of freedom.
Wonder if @benandjerrysUK could send some ice cream to Richard Hammond’s agent so he can be freed from the shackles of toxic masculinity.
11. This menace.
Richard Hammond's worst nightmare.
12. This masculine dessert.
Waiter: we only have ice cream for dessert sir. Richard Hammond: could you put some nails in it and serve it in a pith helmet?
13. This dilemma.
What keeps Richard Hammond awake at night:
14. This totally real, not at all made up, interview with his wife.
This excerpt from a 2013 interview with Richard Hammond's wife Amanda is quite interesting.
15. This fatal tale.
Richard Hammond frantically bats a Calippo out of his son's grasp. It is too late. His son jazz hands his way to the sandpit.
16. This realisation.
So, Richard Hammond, how come the manliest man ever was named after an ice cream?
17. This plea for help.
.@RichardHammond HELLO I HAVE BEEN EATING ICE CREAM FOR YEARS AND I'M STILL HETEROSEXUAL WHAT I AM DOING WRONG PLEASE HELP
18. This incriminating reveal.
19. This phallic pudding.
I call this dessert 'The Richard Hammond.'