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29 Things People Wish They Knew About Anal Sex Before Trying It

"Don't remove anal beads as if you're starting a lawnmower."

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We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us what they wish they knew about anal sex before trying it for the first time. Here are some of the best responses:


9. Enjoying (or not enjoying) anal sex doesn't "say" anything about you.

Lifetime / Via

"I wish I'd known that liking it doesn't make you a 'bad girl' or a 'bad person' or less respectable, or anything like that!"

—Crystal WootBoots, Facebook

10. The wrong toy might literally get lost in your ass.

Twitter: @CrapTaxidermy

"Be careful which toys you use. My fiancé put a vibrator in my butt while we were doing vaginal doggy and the vibrator FELL INTO MY BUTT. Like my butt swallowed the vibrator whole. We spent ten minutes trying to pull it out before finally doing it successfully."

—Sydney LeDonne, Facebook


14. No matter how much you mentally prepare, your butt still has a mind of its own.


"Even if you love anal, know how to prepare, and do everything you should to be ready for it, your ass will always decide if now is the time to play 'do I have to shit or not?'"

—Rachel Glenn, Facebook


16. Douching beforehand may not be for everyone.

Samuelbrownng / Getty Images / Via

"Some swear by douching, but I had an 'accidental anal water retention' that led to 'incidental release.' Long story short, I've never douched since."

—B Quanchi, Facebook


21. You might not like it at all, and that's totally OK.

FOX / Via

"I wish I had known I wouldn't like it, and didn't have to feel guilty about it! Some people just don't like it and never will and no amount of lube in the world will change that, and that's perfectly OK."



24. Severe pain definitely means you should stop.

Instagram: @mourningarts / Via

"Don't rush no matter how in the moment and sexy it is. I made this mistake and ignored all of the pain. I woke up the next day in a pool of dried butt blood. It looked like a murder scene! I recovered, but severe hemorrhoids are no joke."

Christian Patterson

25. Even if you don't have a penis, you can still top like a pro.

"I wish I knew that giving (for me, pegging) is just as fun as receiving. People are too quick to judge something before trying it!"


26. Don't copy the moves in porn as if it's an airplane safety video.

Disney / Via

"Porn makes us think it's so easy/natural to just slide on in and start pounding away. Porn is also edited & the actors are much more experienced than your average couple."



28. Mutual consent and respect are key.

Instagram: @franktheskiff / / Via

"I wish I would've known that it's not something to do with someone who can't be loving, if that's what you need. If you're hesitant and he's all for it, I think it's really easy for boundaries to be crossed and for you to end up feeling disrespected or used rather than feeling like it was supposed to be pleasurable for the both of you."


29. Most importantly, that the butt is just really just like any other part of the body.

Andrew Christian / GoodAssDick / Via

"The butt is such a taboo part of the body but why should it be? I'm glad I got over my insecurities and explored this area of my sex life. It brings my partner and myself both extreme pleasure and that's a beautiful thing."



This post has been updated to reflect that switching directly from anal to vaginal sex can increase the risk of infection in the vagina and urethra. A previous version of this post only mentioned the possibility of yeast infections.