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Reminder: You Should Never Wear Bootcut Jeans

Your trousers should never double up as a street sweeper.

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Is this what you want people to think of you?

Stonewashed bootcut jeans. International code for 'I'm a prick'.

Think about how it's damaging future relationships.

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And that's because he's a weird anti-fashion vacuum.

Tommy Jackson / Stringer / Via Getty Images

Sweeper jeans, too many buttons and a middle parting?

Somehow Simon manages to make this work. It's devilry.

Ok?