9 Thanksgiving Questions You're Dying To Have Answered

What awkward personal questions will you be asked this year? Every Thanksgiving brings the same turkey and traditions, but there are some things you can't predict.

1. Will the turkey be moist or dry?

There can only be one correct answer.

And that answer will be scientifically determined by whichever is declared first. The whole group will agree, no matter what it is.

2. Who will get the smallest piece of pie?

“Oh, just give me a small piece. No, no—smaller. Just a sliver…

Oh no, that’s too big! I couldn’t possibly!

…Well, I mean, I guess I could eat it…”

3. Will you think of something you’re thankful for in time for your turn?

Yes. But it will be lame.

4. Will someone start playing Christmas music?

Follow up: if yes, will it spark discussion on the Christmas season coming too early...

...Or the ongoing War on Christmas

5. Are they sleeping, or are they dead?

Doesn't hurt to check, okay?

6. Which uncles will start a political/religious debate?

Via theonion.com

Spoiler alert: no one wins.

7. What awkward personal questions will you be asked this year?

They may be the classics (“Why are you still single?” “When are you having kids?” “If you could go back in time and change your college major, would you?”), but you should probably be prepared for anything.

8. How many times will an absent family member be gossiped about?

9. And finally... Embarrassing childhood photos/stories: before or after dessert?