Grandma's Birthday Ruined By Huge Penis [nsfw]

BIC customer complains that his pen will only draw massive dongs. BIC responds with a hilarious ultimatum.

In a [presumed] parodical letter sent to BIC, an angry customer stated that his BIC pen would "only draw large cocks."

dearcustomerrelations.com

An ingenious BIC customer relations representative wrote back to the concerned customer with an epic win.

i.imgur.com

Dear Mr. Harrison,

Thank you very much for your letter bringing our attention to your faulty BIC pen. We produce 1.7 billion BIC pens every year so unfortunately, we cannot test each and every one.

Having spoken to our team of engineers, we cannot ascertain why one of the medium point Bic crystal ball point pens that you purchased "only draws large cocks". We have never heard of this occurring previously and we couldn't recreate this anomaly so we can only assume that this pen was temporarily possessed and we will drop it off at a local church for exorcism.

Hopefully it won't up accidentally next to the marriage register.

We are sorry to hear that this pen ruined your Grandmother's Birthday card and that you must now sign for credit card purchases by "penning an enormous phallus". Luckily, Chip and Pin is prevalent throughout the UK.

As an apology, I have enclosed 5x fine point BIC Orange stick pens for your usage. I have personally tested each one for erroneous genitalia production and these seem to be OK.

Yes, the pen lids are very good for scratching in your ears and blowing through the lids is a great way to annoy people. No, we have never received any reports of our orange BIC disposable razors shaving penises into things.

Many thanks,

Edgar Hernandez

Advertising and Promotional Products.

I hope Grandma's birthday wasn't completely ruined. Next year, try writing her card in pencil.