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    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      I worked at a Kwik Kar for 4 hours. I was the girl that would come into the lobby to inform you about the crack in your windshield (that I’m sure you knew nothing about) and my job was to try and convince you to pay for a “state-of-the-art” resin that would magically fix the crack for next to nothing (yeah fucking right). I was waiting in the car port area and I looked down at one of the underground ports at a mechanic who was supposed to be working on the underbelly of a car. He had been staring at me the entire morning and in this moment, we locked eyes and he wiggled his tongue at me. I “left for my lunch break” and never returned. #WhyIquit

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      My old roommate has a very sensitive spirit and a very real fear of death. She also suffers from diagnosed anxiety disorders. One night, completely sober, she broke down about her anxieties about death and how she was terrified that death would take her before she could experience everything she wanted to experience in this life. The next morning, I woke up 2 hours earlier than normal before work and went and bought her a huge bouquet of flowers from a local florist, cooked her a big breakfast, and hand wrote her a note telling her that while it sometimes doesn’t seem fair that we have to die or lose those that we love to death, death might just be the next big adventure for us as humans. Until then, we must seek out that which makes us unapologetically happy and hold tight to the beautiful and meaningful things in life that constantly surround us. Then I made a list of all the wonderful things and people she has in her life. She said that no one had ever done anything like that for her before. It is such a cherished memory for both of us.

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      I suffer from major depressive disorder and binge-eating disorder. Something that I’ve recently picked up is keeping an “emotions” journal. I keep a written record of my emotions throughout the day, as well as my food intake and exercise. I’ve found it extremely helpful to have a visual of my emotions and how what I eat and exercise affect them. It was sobering to go back and read how I was feeling after my last binge. On the other hand, it was quite encouraging to read how I feel after a long workout or after a day of making really healthy food choices. Along with a deeper sense of emotional understanding, this practice has acted as motivation to not let my mental illnesses take the reigns of each day. It’s a perfect reminder that healthy eating and exercise can elicit real results when it comes to supplemental treatment of my disorders.

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      I absolutely love this article. I also lost over 100 pounds several years ago, and after gaining back and losing multiple times through crash dieting and falling off the wagon again and again, I am currently embarking on a second weight loss journey that doesn’t involve the scale at all. Thank you, Arielle, for sharing your story. This helps so many people more than you’ll ever know. What you do is important and has such a profound purpose, not just for your close friends and family, but people all over the world who see what you’ve accomplished. It gives them hope and inspires people to improve their own lives. I’ve bookmarked this so I can return to it from time to time to remind myself that there are people who understand my struggle and the overwhelmingly wonderful but challenging experience of losing weight. Thank you so much again. ❤

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      Went over to a fuck buddy’s house for sex thinking that my period was over with. I had some light spotting the day before but I was convinced it was over. Turns out it wasn’t. And it decided to grace us with its presence just after he starts going down on me. No words can quite express the dread of having your partner stop dead in his tracks and you looking down to see blood all over his sheets as well as his mouth. Pure horror. Safe to say I hightailed it out there, mortified, and never saw him again.

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      This article really hits home for me, and to be honest, it’s hard for me to fully grasp how I feel about it. I lost over 100 pounds a few years ago after completely overhauling my diet and starting an exercise regimen. Some things I didn’t lose, however, were the crippling depression, negative body image, and complete lack of self esteem that I had dealt with my entire life. I admire this woman for the simple fact that she is able to accept and love her body, something I have never been able to do in the slightest, regardless of it’s size. As far as her health, who am I to know or say what her health status is? Yes, a mountain of scientific medical research shows obesity can negatively affect your health. But does that mean overweight or obese people can’t be happy? I wish more than anything that I could have somehow discovered a way to accept my body and all of its flaws when I was 100 pounds heavier, for I know for a fact that it was definitely possible. Also, there are a myriad of reasons that can lead a person to become overweight or obese. For me, it was major depressive disorder and binge-eating disorder. Documentable, diagnosable mental illnesses. I’m confident those two disorders are highly underdiagnosed. I don’t mean to generalize or to discount the fact that free will does indeed exist. But there are so many highly influential factors, both internal and external, that can significantly impact someone’s weight and make it very difficult to counteract. It’s so much more complicated and multi-layered than the popular mentality that fat people are just “lazy”, “have no self control”, and “just can’t put the donuts down”.

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      I have binge-eating disorder, and have had it since pre-pubescence. After becoming morbidly obese in college, I worked my ass off (literally) and lost over 100 pounds. Since then, one of the biggest struggles I face is spending time with my friends. I’ve actively chosen a lifesytle of healthful eating and exercise, and essentially all of my friends don’t partake it any of that. Since we live in a culture where practically everything revolves around food, it is very difficult to maintain my lifestyle when going out. I wish my friends would understand that to be surrounded by junk food and people eating it is a massive trigger for me to binge. Sometimes I can breathe deep and handle it. But there are days when I just can’t. So I wish my friends would either not make me feel guilty for passing on an invitation to go out, or every once in a while, make plans to do something that doesn’t involve unhealthy food or alcohol.

    • caitlina4c00b0abb

      Living in Texas, you have the pleasure of indulging in God’s gift to Earth, which is Tex-Mex. On the flip side, however, if you choose a Mexican restaurant unwisely, you WILL pay the price. My college roommates and I decided to try this Ma & Pa Mexican place in our artsy college town that we lived in. Everyone and their cat raved about this place. So we go, and we order a solid $100 of Tex-Mex between 4 people (for those with no reference point, $100 of Tex-Mex is A LOT of food). As we had hoped, it was dabomb.com. But little did we know of the utter horror that was about to occur just a meer 3 hours later. It hit me first. It felt like a thousand little demons were stabbing my insides with white-hot daggers. I ran to the downstairs master bathroom and the gates of hell blasted open. I’m sweating, crying, and shitting the most I ever have. Then, I hear a bang. One of my roommates bypassed the downstairs half-bath because as fate would have it, THE HALF-BATH TOILET WAS BROKEN. So my roommate comes flying like a bat outta hell into the master bath, tears open the door, and proceeds to vomit partially- digested, bacteria-ridden Tex-Mex all over my half-naked body which was currently expelling the contents of satan’s soul into the toilet. This prompted me to then vomit all over myself and the bathroom. I still have nightmares sometimes. You can’t even begin to imagine the smell. It was one of the most horrific things to ever happen to me. And if you’re wondering, after a LONG hiatus, I am back to eating my beloved Tex-Mex. I’m just quite a bit more picky about where I eat it.

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