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6 Things That Actually Cause Bad Blood In Real Life

So you've never had beef with Katy Perry? You can still relate to Taylor...literally.

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1. Cat bites.

Don't be fooled by those precious, furry faces or those teeny, tiny paws. Lurking behind that doe-eyed exterior is a savage, pasteurella multocida-laden beast. A 3-year study revealed a nip from their razor-tipped incisors can be enough to send you to the hospital with a serious infection. Me-owchie.

2. Burgers the size of your face.

#NationalBurgerDay is my favorite holiday

A diet too rich in red meat can make your blood cholesterol levels soar higher than Shake Shack's IPO. When cholesterol builds, heart disease can follow. No amount of fries with that is worth it.

3. Lance Armstrong's life choices in 1999.

Afp / Getty Images

Oh, Lance. The nation emitted a sad, inevitable sigh in 2012 when a lengthy U.S. Anti-Doping Agency (USADA) report confirmed you had, in fact, done unnatural stuff to boost your red blood cell production during those glorious, Tour de France-collecting years. The transfusions may have temporarily boosted your oxygen capacity, Lance. But they forever broke our hearts.

4. Your Mom.

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She's the reason you don't need braces and have brown eyes. But that inherited X chromosome can also cause unfortunate blood disorders like hemophilia, even if no one else in the family's ever had one before. Your irrational fear of the dentist? That's not her fault. Blame your dad for that one.

5. This unappetizing grooming practice.

Fact: Bloodborne pathogens can enter your body through nicks, scrapes or recently shaved legs from unsterilized tools or a soak in that cesspool otherwise known as a pedicure tub. Sandal season is overrated. Just wear socks and be done with it.

6. Future ex boyfriends.

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Couple tattoos are rarely a good idea, in terms of other people liking you. Adding potential injury to eye rolls, tattoo ink is not regulated by the FDA. If inked with unsanitary equipment, complications from bloodborne diseases like tetanus can hurt far worse than the breakup.

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