3. Super Busy Guy
“AAAAHHH I’m so sorry, but something literally just came up with work and I have to bail — I know, I know, I am the worst. Things have just been INSANE lately. Can we try for next week? But after Wednesday because I know things are going to be CRAZY for me until then.” Rinse, wash, repeat.
4. Negging Guy
“It’s so cool how you don’t care that much about how you look.”
See also: Undermining Guy.
5. lower case emailing guy
usually means he’s either passive-aggressive or overly emo/twee
6. Sex Tape Making/Emulating Guy
Does not apply if you met in Craigslist Misc Romance.
7. Fantasy Sports Obsessed Guy
One fantasy league at a time is acceptable. Two is questionable. Three or more, goodbye ever doing anything except watching sports!
8. “I Just Ran Out of Condoms” Guy
9. Weird Diet Guy
Enjoy constantly accommodating his diet of nuts, berries and salmon.
See also: “That’s Unhealthy” Guy.
10. Overly Groomed Guy
Never trust a man with a hair dryer.
13. Always Orders For You Guy
MAYBE THE LADY DOESN’T WANT THE STEAK, OKAY?
18. Maxim Subscriber
- Tonight at 8:30pm ET, BuzzFeed is celebrating the biggest night in Hollywood, the Oscars, with a live show and tipsy game of bingo 🏆🍹
- Philip Bilden, the businessman nominated by President Trump to be Secretary of the Navy, has withdrawn himself from consideration.
- Actor Bill Paxton has died at 61. He starred in classic films including "Twister," "Titanic," "Big Love," and "Aliens."
- The Nokia brick phone is making a comeback — reimagined with a colored screen, but the game Snake hasn't gone anywhere 🐍📲