1. On unspoken seating rules:
People who sit right next to me in an empty movie theater, who hurt you?
2. On phone disruptions:
3. On high prices:
Just took out a loan from Capital One for my movie theater food. Hopefully I can pay it back in 5 years.
4. On avoiding those high prices:
When you gotta sneak food in the movie theater 😏
5. On snacking:
I wanna know what GENIUS made popcorn... the LOUDEST food in the HISTORY of mankind... the mascot for movie theater snacks!!!! 🙄🙄🙄
6. On getting what you really want:
my mom went into some random movie theater and asked for popcorn to go
7. On brilliant theater ideas:
If I ever get rich I’m gonna buy a movie theater that allows dogs but not kids
8. On aging:
You know you old when you’re in the movie theater and you look around for the remote cause it’s too loud.
9. On special skills:
job interview "so do you have any special talents?" me: I can eat all my movie theater popcorn before the previews even start.
10. On making quick friends:
The next time you're at a movie theater while the previews are showing, look at the stranger next to you & say "We should see that together"
11. On unconventional movie snacks:
When the lights dim in the movie theater and she goes into her purse for the 8 piece and biscuits>>>>>
12. On bending rules:
Signs at the movie theater: "ABSOLUTELY NO OUTSIDE FOOD OR DRINK ALLOWED." Me:
13. On almost empty theaters:
when it's just you and one other guy in a movie theater
14. On awkwardness:
movie theater employee: enjoy the movie me: you too
15. On strict theater policies:
To those people that work at the movie theater and put their life on the line to defend the honor of the theater policy chill tf out..
16. On tight spaces:
when you're at the movies and someone has to walk in front of you in the aisle
17. And finally, on comfort:
when every seat is taken n you get front row at the movie theater
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