Office Etiquette For Clueless People

Here are some things to be aware of in your office. If you didn't already know this, you may be a moron.

Stay at home when you're sick; no one wants to see your snot bubbles or hear about your sore throat.

Always show up on time for meetings. If you're habitually late, try scheduling meetings in 45 minute increments to allow enough time to get to your next one.

No one cares about your custom ring tone. Put your phone on vibrate mode to prevent disturbing others.

Pay attention during meetings and avoid multi-tasking, such as scrolling through emails on your smart phone or computer.

Don't hold meetings in your cubicle and distract those sitting nearby. For meetings with more than two people, go to a conference room or a break area.

Use ear buds or headphones to listen to your music.

Be aware of how loud you speak on the telephone if you work in a cubicle environment. If you know you're a loud talker, grab a meeting room.

Avoid wearing perfume or cologne at work. If you must, limit it to one spritz.

Dress appropriately at work. Stop dressing like a slob or slut and show others that you have plenty of other assets.

Just because you hear a conversation does not mean you may join in.

Don't try to make conversation with someone in a bathroom stall!!

Unless the building is on fire, don't interrupt my lunch hour to discuss work.

Respect your co-worker's and company property and don't take things from others without asking. Refrigerator lunch food stealers – that also means you!

Avoid eating smelly food at your desk.

Throw out old food in the fridge. Just because you're a slob at home doesn't mean you need to be one in public.

Don't yell and scream at others. Compassion and empathy will serve you much better to earn respect.

Basically, don't be an asshole and use common sense.