Millennials, it happens to all of us: One day you say or do something that makes you realize you're getting old — or perhaps just makes you feel old.
And a few months ago, Reddit user u/naxxfish had a thread go viral after they posed this question to the r/AskReddit community: "Millennials, what was the most middle-aged thing you caught yourself saying recently?"
Well, people came through with the replies — which, if you're a millennial, you might find relatable, but they might also make you feel old. Here are some of the top-voted and best comments:
1. "Wanted to buy a snack and then thought, No, I have food at home."
2. "'You want to go out for dinner?' 'Oh no, I can’t. I have chicken in the fridge that I have to cook before it goes bad.'"
3. "That classic 'dad groan' when standing up."
4. "My knees hurt."
5. "Why do I get up every day and crack like a glowstick without the glow? It’s so disappointing."
6. "I slapped a crate I had strapped onto the back of my car and said, 'This isn't going anywhere.'"
7. "I am looking forward to going to bed."
8. "Calling a 21-year-old guy a 'kid.'"
9. "I can't fix one thing in my house without at least 15 minutes of complaining about the previous owner's handiwork."
10. "Why is the music so loud in here?!"
11. "Scrolling through my Spotify and constantly asking, 'Who the hell are these people?'"
12. "I tried listening to the Apple Music Top 100 yesterday for a change of pace, and it all sounded like hot garbage — 'WHAT ARE KIDS EVEN LISTENING TO THESE DAYS?!'"
13. "No, I’m okay. It just takes my back a little while to loosen up in the morning."
14. "Had a riveting conversation with some friends about the best office chairs for lumbar support."
15. "Said, 'Oh no, thank you. I can't have caffeine this late in the day or I'll never get to sleep tonight.' My spouse was offering me the last soda from the fridge. It was 1 p.m."
16. "I'm 33, not quite middle-aged, but circumstances last year forced me to live on the campus of the local university I was attending to finish my bachelor's. I got to know a few of my neighbors — who were all in their late teens/early 20s — and one day while I was just lounging by myself, I put on System of a Down's Toxicity for some nostalgia."
"It didn't hit me until after 'Chop Suey' was done that most of the people on campus were younger than that album. Oof."
17. "In a conversation with a friend, 'I managed to find a really good knife block recently...'"
18. "When my wife asked if there was anything she needed to pick up at the store, and I responded, 'I think we're out of asparagus.' Not sure what foul demon possessed me to say those words."
19. "I bought a really nice vacuum cleaner, and I told three friends about it. They were very interested. One of them asked me where and went and bought one too."
20. "I was venting to a coworker about these noisy bastards living next to me. I actually said the words, 'Goddamn teenagers and their Bluetooth machines.' I stand by my admonition, but man, it was my greatest age leap forward since I embraced the sensible Toyota."
21. "I saw a few teenagers out in short skirts and light tops, and I turned to my partner and said, 'Jaysus, are they not freezing with not a coat between them?' I am old."
22. "I saw a mannequin at Target wearing a very short jumper dress and said, out loud, 'This is so short! Who can wear this comfortably? It wouldn't even pass the fingertip test!' My husband laughed at me and just steered me away so we could pay for the new bin I wanted for my compost."
"I have become 'that lady' and I am ashamed."
23. "While at Home Depot: 'Oh yeah, that's some good lumber.'"
24. "It was in my head, but I was taking a walk at night and decided to go around a park as opposed to through it because There sure are a lot of youths in there tonight."
25. "Had a conversation with my coworker about how I saw the first Spider-Man (with Tobey Maguire) in theaters. He wasn't born yet."
26. "After recently installing a replacement security camera, I saw in the saved footage some kids repeatedly riding their bikes and/or playing in my driveway, occasionally hitting the shrubs that line the driveway and scattering gravel/compost around."
"I found myself ranting to my wife, wanting to know why these kids were constantly in my driveway, and wanting to know why their parents were not doing a better job of watching/teaching/disciplining them.
"Then I froze, and realized...I'd become that guy. That old guy. It has sparked an existential crisis."
27. "'Quit touching the goddamn thermostat, you’re driving the bill up!'"
28. "I was eating lunch with a coworker last week, and she was bitching about the weird clothes her parents wore in high school. JNCOs, wallet chains that were like 4 feet long, and some other stuff. But as I’m listening to her, I realize that she’s describing my high school experience, so I ask her, 'How old are your parents?' She responded, 'Ugh, they’re 40!'"
"I’m 37, turning 38 in two weeks. After I told her that, we both got really quiet and changed the subject. Someone, please help me. I’m not ready for this."
And finally...
29. "Not something I said, but I just stood out on my porch this morning drinking my coffee, and someone drove by pretty fast and I thought, That’s way too fast."
You can read the full thread of responses on r/Ask/Reddit.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.