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Never Give A Woman A Combat Job

The U.S. military is on course to open combat positions to female service members. Some skeptics worry that if women can engage in hand-to-hand combat to the death with jihadists, they'll just keep asking for more. They are right to worry. History shows that American women are going to keep demanding more opportunities to prove their equality with men.

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Since 2013, the U.S. military has been a course to open all combat positions--including infantry, armor and special operations jobs--to qualified female service members by January 2016.

But some people--mostly men, unsurprisingly--question whether women truly have the physical strength, mental resilience and all-around gumption to be true assets on the battlefield. They worry that if women can pick up guns, drive tanks and engage in hand-to-hand combat to the death with jihadists, they'll just keep asking for more.

They are right to worry. A close examination of history shows that American women are like the eponymous title character in "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie." Like the mouse, once they have their cookie, they are just going to keep demanding more opportunities to prove their equality with men.

Don't believe me? Check out these women who kept wanting more.

If you let a woman serve in Congress, she’s going to ask for the right to vote

U.S. National Archives / Via archives.gov

The 19th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, extending the right of suffrage to women. Ratified in 1920.

And once she's voted, she’s going to demand to serve alongside men in the military

Via womensmemorial.org

In 1948, President Harry Truman signed into law the Women's Armed Services Integration Act of 1948, which gave women permanent status in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marine Corps.

We now pause for a few words directed toward opponents of women in combat

View this video on YouTube

YouTube / Via youtube.com

Once she serves with men, she’s going to want to break the sound barrier like men

commons.wikimedia.org / Via afhra.maxwell.af.mil

In 1953, accompanied by Chuck Yeager, the first man to break the sound barrier, Cochran flew a F-86 Sabre plane at an average speed of over 652 mph. Cochran went on to become the first woman to break Mach 2 and to take off from an aircraft carrier.

Once she’s flown fast and far, she’s going to demand equal pay for equal work

Courtesy of Bozeman Business and Professional Women / Via bozemanbpw.org

In 1963, President John F. Kennedy signed into law the Equal Pay Act of 1963, which prohibited sex-based wage discrimination between men and women in the same establishment who performed jobs that required substantially equal skill, effort and responsibility under similar working conditions

Once she has equal pay (at least in theory), she’s going to want to ban gender discrimination

Getty Images / Via virgin.com

The enactment of the Civil Rights Act in 1964 and the United States Education Amendments of 1972 (Title IX) banned gender-based discrimination in the workplace and in schools. Clearly it didn't ban all forms of discrimination within the military.

Then she’s going to look up, and she’s going to want to go into space

Courtesty of NASA / Via nasa.gov

Sally Ride, a trained physicist and astronaut, entered orbit aboard the space shuttle Challenger in 1983.

At some point, all of these accomplishments are going to make her want to prove her mettle by commanding U.S. soldiers in battle

Via Makers.com / Via assets.makers.com

"During the invasion of Panama in 1989, CPT Linda Bray became the first woman to lead US troops in battle. CPT Bray commanded of the 988th Military Police Company out of Ft. Benning, GA, and ordered her assault team to fire on soldiers of the Panamanian Defense Forces (PDF) who refused to surrender their positions at a dog kennel. She anticipated a routine operation, but the battle turned into a three-hour, infantry-style firefight." - Women in Military Service for America Memorial

Then she's going to get it into her head that "Anything men can do, I can do better"

View this video on YouTube

YouTube / Via youtube.com

MJ, you got beat. By a girl. That's cool.

And now we pause for a few more words from our sponsors

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YouTube / Via youtube.com

Don't worry, he got over it.

Once she’s commanded soldiers and drank Gatorade, she’s going to absurdly think she can command athletes. And she’ll want to coach in the NFL

Associated Press / Via huffingtonpost.com

In 2015, the Arizona Cardinal hired Jen Welter as a training camp/preseason intern coaching inside linebackers. This was not an affirmative action hire. In 2014 Welter became the first female to play a non-kicking position in men's professional football, when she took the field as a running back (RUNNING BACK) for the Indoor Football League's Texas Revolution.

In the above photo from August 15, she's shaking hands with Sarah Thomas, the first woman to work as a full-time on-field official for a NFL preseason game.

Kudos also to basketball legend Becky Hammon, who in 2014 was hired by the San Antonio Spurs as the first female assistant coach in NBA history and in 2015 became the first head coach of a NBA summer league team.

And after you’ve given her all those things, she’s still going to want more. She’s going to become the first paraplegic female veteran to serve in Congress

When Members of Congress debate women in combat, I look down at the stumps of my legs & wonder, where do they think I was - in a bar fight?

Illinois Congresswoman Tammy Duckworth is an Iraq War veteran who suffered severe combat wounds while serving as an Army helicopter pilot. She lost both of her legs and was the first female double amputee from the war. You do not want to mess with this woman. But she would be happy if you to vote for her.

She’s going to struggle up every hill, cross every river and grit her teeth alongside her male counterparts during the U.S. Army’s elite Ranger School

Courtesy of the U.S. Army / Via army.mil

Two female Army officers will make history on Friday, August 21 when they become the first women to graduate from the historically all-male Army Ranger School. Hooah soldiers.

If you give a woman an inch (or a cookie), she’ll want a combat job. And once she has that combat job, she’s going to think that she’s qualified to perform every job that a man can do. And then, god forbid, she’s going to want everything

And that is why you can never give a woman a combat job

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