1.
We have the greatest licence on the planet.
2.
And we're SO GREAT even Heisenberg thought it would be a good place to relocate.
3.
We know how to come up with a good sledge.
4.
And our motorbikes are trained.
5.
We ask little of our visitors.
6.
Our newspapers are great at breaking the big news.
7.
And in New Zealand, NO ASHTRAY IS SAFE.
8.
We label things so that they're easy to find.
9.
Our locations are convenient and appropriately named:
10.
AND YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND THE ISSUES WE FACE EVERY DAY.
12.
We eat kids (if necessary).
13.
But we don't dillydally on the youths and their silly hair.
14.
We invented the sheepskin nipple warmer.
15.
And we're protective of our bread.
17.
And our tortoises are famous.
18.
We have potato-flavored potato chips.
19.
We know Marmite will always be better than Vegemite.
20.
And we have a strong stance on "night-wear."
21.
Our mailboxes are creative and unique.
22.
Our papers have exciting headlines.
23.
But our advertising can sometimes be a little false.
24.
Our churches are cool.
26.
But we do not allow horses.
27.
Our signs can be a little confusing...
28.
As can be our prime minister...
29.
But we're still the most beautiful nation on Earth :)
