1.If you're gonna be late to work, scrape your car window just enough to see barely out the front.
2.Keep your thermostat at a balmy 80 degrees -- you don't have to wait 6 months to enjoy summer temperatures!
3.With all of the snow coming through, there's gonna be some trouble starting your car. Sled to work in a canoe instead!
4.Make sure to take your spear and knife on the way to work just in case you happen to encounter any mastodons or saber tooth tigers.
5.Also, it's time to catch up on your Inuit survival tactics. After being snowed in for three days, going out and hunting arctic animals in the blizzard doesn't sound that bad
6.Use the tennis racquets you bought last summer when you wanted to impress that guy/girl and use them as snowshoes
7.If there happens to be a huge snowstorm coming, run over to the store and buy as much food as possible. Make sure to look extremely panicked and try to destroy anything that happens to be in your path.
8.If you ever get lost at night, look for clusters of brightly lit houses. Nobody takes down their Christmas lights in Indiana until March.
9.Become obsessed with local, warm food while keeping the past few winter months from being so bad..
10.If you're the kind of person who sings Christmas carols until February (weirdo), you must stop by Santa's vacation home in Santa Claus, Indiana.
11.You know what, just stay inside. It's not worth trying. Go back to bed.