Having A Baby Changes Your Career

The birth of my son changed my life. From A to Z. When he emerged, purple and lizard-like and screaming, I lost my breath. He looked exactly like his 3D ultrasounds, mysterious cleft chin and all. I was officially a father. Someone’s dad. That’ll mess with your noggin. Every moment since that one has been more important than any moment before. I am no longer living for myself; I am living to enable my son’s happiness and success. His existence changes everything about me – my decision to walk through a questionable neighborhood; my 401k and college fund allocations; how I approach a subway platform. It also changes my approach to my career. Aside from getting a sweet, sleepless two weeks off of work, having a baby changes a lot about your career. Here are the changes I’ve noticed.

1. Play It Safe

You have a f**king baby. That’s a huge responsibility. If you are the primary breadwinner (or even the majority breadwinner), you will feel a newfound pressure to produce – and produce consistently. It’s not just about making sure your kid stays in diapers, or about making sure they have a nice, stable plan for the future (although of course it is). It’s also about the psychological welfare of everyone at home. Your wife or husband may be relying on you to provide the tinder to the No Worries fire (I loved writing that sentence). But you will feel it, I guarantee.

It changes the way you approach confrontation and risk. It’s a whole other huge component in your logical progression. Sometimes, you censor yourself.

2. But Take Risks

But then you think, what would I want my son or daughter to do in this situation? Would I want them to act out of fear, or safety, and to choose a path they are pretty sure will not lead to the most amazing results? “No way!” you say. “No way in hell! I want them to swing for the fences, and to do anything that will allow them to follow their tiny, fast-paced heart!”

So listen to that sentiment, as much as you feasibly can. Don’t throw your career out the window, but don’t get stuck in the safety dance. Do some shit. Mix it up a bit. Always consider what you would want your spawn to do in the same situation. Sometimes you’ll be surprised at how you change your course of action when you ask that question.

3. Make Sure You Are Satisfied

Your satisfaction in your career is actually pretty important to everyone else. They love you, yes, and they want you to be happy. But more than that, you bring home your mood. If you are constantly angry or bitter or assholey because of your job, you impact your household. And the result is like a little storm cloud hanging over your family.

So make sure, whatever you do, that you are satisfied. Plot the appropriate course to ensure you are happy. Or at least mildly content. Your baby will thank you. Probably much later.