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    Anatomy Of A Short Story Cover Letter

    How your heartfelt 'Submittable' cover letter will actually be read!

    Dear [MAGAZINE THAT PAYS] editors,

    I am a great fan of your output. [read: THE FACT THAT YOU ACTUALLY PAY.]

    Over the years, your stories have moved me; made me laugh, made me cry. [YOU HUMAN? I HUMAN TOO!]

    Magazines like yours are vital to the literary community. [YOU GUYS USE PAYPAL, RIGHT?]

    I would like to submit the attached short story [SLOPPILY-TRUNCATED NOVEL LEFTOVER] for your consideration.

    It is part of a longer collection developed during my MFA [ARE YOU HIRING EDITORIAL ASSISTANTS AT THE MOMENT?] and that all center around themes of family, loss, and the fragility of relationships. [PEOPLE IN KITCHENS, COLD COFFEE, ELLIPSES.]

    It is a piece that is very near and dear to my heart [BE GRATEFUL FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO GLIMPSE IT, YOU CORPORATE CONDÉ NAST STOOGE.].

    I hope that it finds a home in your magazine. [MY STORY IS A PUPPY! DO YOU HATE PUPPIES?]

    Thank you for reading,


    Name* / Via Shimmerzine