Why Pacific Rim Gives Me A Bushel Of Boners

...and why you should feel the same way.

Ok so we know it's about colossal robots doing battle with vicious alien monsters, right?

google.com

We don't deserve this :')

Right.

But you better not let me catch you calling it Transformers 4.

So... I know what you may be thinking.

But before you make that ill-advised snap judgement, please consider the following:

Listen up, ya turds!

First of all: this movie is directed by GUILLERMO DEL TORO!

Just look at that lovable mug.

Who? Oh just the dude responsible for the creation of such awesome shit as Pan's Labyrinth...

"Your OK Cupid account does you no justice, babe!"

Hellboy 1 and 2...

He's the devil but he's a good guy and it's just really perplexing and great.

PS: Homeboy Ron Perlman (above) also has a badass cameo in Pacific Rim.

And the super creepy, Spanish-language horror movie, The Orphanage.

Everyone boycott the remake or you'll be haunted by this cute lil' demon forever.

So we know that Pacific Rim was crafted lovingly by a nerd god... but is it any good?

Love me love me, say that you love me.

Yes ma'am! Most critics love the film! In fact, Pacific Rim is currently 72% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes.

Not certified fresh, just certified bonerific.

But like.... why do I even care about this?

Why man?

Well, besides the fact that it's the first ORIGINAL blockbuster in years (eons, maybe).

No guys. It's not Transformers. Seriously guys. Srsly. It's not. Shut up.

It has a kickass supporting cast (yep there are people in it too! PEOPLE!)

What is this picture of Idris Elba and why isn't framed in my apartment?

Charlie Day!

Don't you dare forget about me.

And state of the art special effects by Industrial Light & Magic, the company responsible for Avatar, The Avengers, and pretty much every other cool movie.

Bask in the non-Transformers glory!!!

So, despite the god-awful marketing campaign which makes the movie look like the live-action blockbuster version of a 12-year old's wet dream (maybe not inaccurately), Pacific Rim is awesome.

This may actually be the movie's finest piece of advertising.

Unfortunately, most people haven't gotten the memo, seeing as Pacific Rim is currently behind this sack of shit at the box office.

Omg why does this exist?! Someone please make it stop!

WHAT THE F*&%?!

*Sigh* I don't get it either, big guy...

So for Pete's sake, do yourself a mega favor and go see this already underrated but bombastically fun movie ASAP.

#endrant