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19 Things That Are Apparently True In Porn, But In Reality Are Fucking Lies

"Porn definitely doesn't sit on a throne of lies" said nobody ever.

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1. Sex never happens without three or four cameras recording.

DreamWorks

2. An average-size dick is eight inches.

3. You don't have to stop what you're doing to rummage around in your top drawer for a condom.

You also don't fumble with the wrapper, put it on the wrong way, and possibly lose your erection. That never happens.
Sony Pictures Television

You also don't fumble with the wrapper, put it on the wrong way, and possibly lose your erection. That never happens.

4. In fact, condoms aren't really necessary at all.

Channel 5

5. Scripted dialogue has to happen before sex, no buts.

NBC

6. Sex has to include a minimum of four positions or you're not doing it right.

NBC

7. Everybody has the stamina to fuck for hours if they really want to.

Logo TV

8. The only way to finish sex properly is with a facial.

Warner Bros

9. You orgasm at least once during sex, every time.

MTV

10. Women squirt without fail.

CBS

11. Everybody's vagina and dick is straight-up bald.

TBS

12. Sex has to be hard and fast or you're not actually doing it right.

E4

13. Everybody is flexible enough to get their legs behind their heads and bend themselves into other extraordinary positions.

ABC

14. Anal sex is easy and takes minimal effort.

Syfy

15. Lube isn't really necessary ever.

Walt Disney Studios

16. You can fuck the landlord to say sorry for missing your rent payment.

NBC

17. If you're failing a class, you can just fuck the teacher and pass.

Fox

18. It doesn't matter if you don't have the money to pay for your pizza, you can just fuck the delivery guy.

Syndication

19. And on your doctor's desk, in your teacher's stationary cupboard, and in the sea, are just some of the normal places everybody has sex at least once in their lifetime.

We've all been there, right?
Channel 5

We've all been there, right?