13 Sex Stories That’ll Make You Want To Go To Church, Get On Your Knees, And Pray

    Jesus did not die for your sins so you could fuck in his house, I'm just saying.

    So a while ago we asked the BuzzFeed Community for the wildest places they'd had sex and one of the most popular answers was... church. So here are 13 of the best (or worst, depending on how you look at it) church stories...

    1. The Christian retreat.

    I had sex at a Christian retreat centre with Jesus watching over us (literally, his picture was in every room above the bed).

    laralong

    2. The Easter celebration.

    We got bored while bowling, so we snuck outside to the back and did it behind a dumpster. The bowling alley was right next to a church. And it was on Easter.

    aj141915

    3. The church wedding.

    I had sex in one of the closets at the church during my mother's wedding. After the ceremony she and her new husband were posing for pictures so my (now ex) boyfriend and I sneaked away for a quickie.

    blixx

    4. The mom's vehicle.

    We hopped in the backseat of a jeep in a church parking lot when we were teenagers. I married him and his mom still drives the vehicle.

    angelinan4bcbd51f2

    5. The Sunday sessions.

    In high school I dated a preacher's son. We would sneak next door to the church and do it in the Sunday school room. Afterwards we would go back to the house and watch VeggieTales with his parents. If there is a hell, I'm screwed. Pun maybe intended.

    quietmegan

    6. The drop to hell.

    I had sex at an outdoor church, over a ravine that was at least 15ft deep, with nothing but a few 2x4s sticking out of the ground to keep us from falling over the edge. We almost went to hell real quick.

    punkpoppy

    7. The baptismal pool.

    Once my boyfriend and I left in the middle of an evening service in a Baptist church to go and have sex in the baptismal pool located in the old sanctuary that nobody used anymore. We both got a real thrill out of it.

    prinuthina13

    8. The cleaning lady.

    I used to work as a church cleaning lady and had sex in multiple places inside the church: pews, the pulpit, the balcony. If only the people there knew.

    0220char

    9. The basement steps.

    Me and a group of friends were getting high at the "stoner church" behind our high school. I lost my virginity on the basement steps outside where anyone walking by could see. And yes I am going to hell for fucking at a church, but #noregrets.

    kimberlyjackson1998

    10. The bible study trip.

    My boyfriend (now husband) and I went on a vacation bible study trip together, where we did it in the back of the church van and in the bathroom of a church. We are going to be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary next year!

    gigig45ed71023

    11. The door with no lock.

    I had sex in a church that my husband and I clean three times a weeks. We've done it there in the women's bathroom at least five times this year. It makes it more thrilling because the bathroom door doesn't have a lock on it!

    bambjays

    12. The back row pew.

    I had sex inside of the church (on a random Wednesday afternoon) across the street from the high school I attended, right there on one of the pews in the back row. I saw God a few times that day.

    misssellieface

    13. The church floor.

    I lost my virginity on the floor in a church. I'm probably going to hell.

    —Anonymous

    Note: submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.

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