I hate feet, so just know it probably pains me to write this as much as it might pain you to read it. But here goes...
Kylie Jenner wants you to know that she has "cute-ass feet" and you should stop dragging them. Period. End of discussion.
Kylie was living her best life on holiday when she was joined by big sis Kendall and decided to post a picture to mark the occasion. Cute!
But, because people are kinda strange, they started zooming in on the pic and noticed something that caused a riot. Yep, Kylie's foot. In particular, her middle toe, that is somehow shorter than the rest.
People were having far too much fun in the comments.
And some were being a little mean.
It didn't take long for the heat to reach Kylie's attention, and, for reasons I can't quite fathom, she decided to draw more attention to the toe by zooming in further than was necessary and posting the picture on her Instagram story with a crying emoji.
THEN, not happy with the criticism of her limbs, Kylie posted a whole video dedicated to telling people how cute her feet actually are and why the middle toe is the way it is.
"OK, so everyone wants to come for my fucking toes — by the way, I have cute-ass feet," Kylie began, and from there I knew we were in for A Lot. She is TIRED of each and every one of you!
"I broke this middle toe in middle school," Ms Self-Made Billionaire explained. "There's nothing you can do for a broken toe, so I just had to let it heal how it wanted to heal."
Now going on for 10 seconds too long, Kylie began giving a tutorial on how her toes change when she flexes her feet before acknowledging that, yes, "This is a weird-ass video."
But that didn't stop Stormi's mom from continuing on her merry way. Instead, she stood up and showed how, when she lifts her toes up a certain way, the middle one just kinda, like, doesn't play ball.
Anyway, it doesn't end there. To take the heat off of her and the middle toe situation, Kylie decided to drag her sister into the mix.
At this point, I'm ready to just curl up into a ball under my desk. I've had enough, I want to get off.
I'm sure Stormi was sat in the next room watching Kylie's Instagram story like, "What in god's name is happening here?"
Meanwhile, I'm ready to call the police for the experience I've just been through.
